Feeling tired? Hard to motivate? Feeling like it is a start go kind of start to your year and your intentions? Been sick? Want to get away from it all due to all the emotional overwhelm? Venus, Mars, the South Node, Neptune and Chiron in Pisces is certainly bringing some of this to the surface. Despite being at the start of the new year, we are dealing with perhaps a lot of endings, confusion and uncertainty about how it all is shaping up. We may have the urge to try new things and to start in new directions yet see how our habits and tendencies sway us back to what we know and what we have done. Nothing is easier to start then a bad habit and similarly nothing is harder to lose. The Sun just moved into Aquarius and we may be feeling like shaking it up or perhaps life is shaking up for you without permission. We are collectively trying to learn new ways of being, thinking, relating and creating yet new habits are a bit difficult to start because they feel awkward and unfamiliar. No one is really in that camp yet we have a village in the old camp. The new moon in Aquarius on Friday is helping us conceptualize the habits that perhaps will support the new forms that our lives and world need to move forward into freedom from what has held us back, from a truth that is broader more inclusive and more up to the challenges of the day.
We have been dealing a lot with time with Saturn in Sagittarius in square (tension) to Venus (our bodies and our relationships), Mars (our will and actions) and Chiron (the wound of separation, feeling alone or separated from love, the divine, connection). Sometimes time is teaching by experience and the effects of the choices we make that only become apparent over time. We are also learning about the right timing, when to start, when to let go, when to be patient, when to ask for help, etc (Jupiter in Libra). More than anything I feel we are learning that time is not linear as we often perceive it to be. We think because we become clear about an intention and we set something in motion that time will carry it along and we will move forward into time with this new intention growing and maturing and eventually giving birth to what we think it will yeild emotionally, materially, energetically. Unfortunately, time is not really linear and especially now with the emphasis on Pisces we can be in a time of both new beginnings (recent cardinal T square with Jupiter, Uranus, Pluto) and dissolution and endings all at the same time. Sometimes when something becomes clear and we make a big evolutionary leap with our intentions and understandings what has to happen next falls out of our plans. Sometimes things of our life need to be re-arranged, dismantled and often put to rest. This is the realm of Pisces, the cloud, infinite potential, the workings of the divine and the mystery. When this happens it is easy to feel confused, disheartened, disconnected and to feel we did something wrong. Perhaps, this is the time to learn how to feel these emotions (Pisces is a place of feeling) yet not be tempted to check out, give up or be overwhelmed by it all. It is a time to trust in the mysterious forces and to surrender to the process of change and transformation that we cannot possibly fully understand and predict. When we acknowledge that we feel alone, separate, confused but then stay the course of active participation in our life, then we harness a faith in spirit, ourselves and the power of our truth and intentions. Saturn in Sag has been nudging us towards our truth. We are making choices and we have been paving the way for it but at some point we must pause and wait and let the dots connect and let the fog clear before we keep forging ahead. Otherwise, our habits rule. Habits that perhaps no longer serve us. Habits like when we feel things going a direction that we did not foresee, we force our way, we speed up, we get desperate. Habits like when we get overwhelmed we shut down and give up. We feel sorry for ourselves and we watch another episode of tv or we pour another glass of wine. What will it matter anyway? When we do this (and we all do so no judgment here) we let the past habits rule. The South Node is in Pisces and so when we disconnect and when we cut off from the natural flow, we are going to repeat the habits we have karmically been feeding. Time is not on our side with this as old habits die hard. Pisces is balanced by Virgo. Virgo is about the habits, routines and self-knowledge that we learn about ourselves that leads to improvement and purity of intention. We must be conscious enough to know when we are feeding a "bad/old" habit and opportunity is presenting a new way to relate to the circumstances of our life. A new habit like connecting more to nature or spirit when we feel lost instead of numbing out. A new habit like feeding our other creative outlets when we feel like our intentions are not manifesting as quickly or in the way we feel it should go. The beauty of surrendering into the moment and responding to it with more truth in who we are now (and desire to be) and not who we were is that we can connect to the timeless parts of ourselves. The wise parts of ourselves that know that there is always perfect timing at hand. The divine makes no mistakes. We cannot create what we are not fully embodied in. We cannot surrender what we have not finished learning from. So, perfect timing is best to be allotted to the divine forces of nature that knows when best to support the natural evolution of our growth the cycles of time.
The Sun in Aquarius is helping us with new habits, new perceptions and ideas and inspiration of a truth unattached to emotion and the patterns of the past or the collective. We are inspired by others. We like role models. We are herd creatures. Often it is lonely and not really so desirable to be the lone wolf in the crowd. Some of us don't want to be first or the odd one out. Yet, someone has to break the mold to show us that the mold needed to be morphed. Aquarius is fixed energy so that means it takes the energy that has been initiated and it distributes it and concentrates it so that it can get out to the masses so that it can be sustainable. Some things in our lives and our world are not sustainable. Somethings in our life and world are not able to feed the masses or even all of our growing and evolving selves. Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result right? The mad scientists are often the ones that seem crazy but they are also on to something..perhaps unpopular but often what is needed for necessary reform. Quirky is often a blessing. Unique is not a curse. We need ideas and plans and even habits that work for all of ourselves and diversity of life we face. We often times need to step outside the box to see what was holding us back and what is plugging the drain. Aquarius is the air that breathes in that insight for innovation. On this new moon, be open to what ideas and concepts need reform and what, where and how can you innovate areas of your life that need to be more sustainable and equitable. Where do you need to break out and be a little odd and unique? How can where you feel overwhelmed and overtaken be a pathway to where you might be setting the stage for new habits that are worth repeating time and time again.
Blessings to you all friends!