Well, we made it through the first eclipse (I termed the portal for healing and self-discovery and embodiment) and now as we await next week's lunar eclipse we are in transient ground. We are making new grooves in our karmic wheel and this can feel a bit awkward and even daunting. The old and familiar doesn't feel right and yet the new horizon feels like miles away and perhaps we are not even sure where or how to begin the journey. With Mercury in retrograde, our thinking seems foggy, disjointed, and maybe we are lost in the hows or the whys of what we are observing about the current times. The Virgo industrious energy may sound like a squeaky wheel in our mental landscape urging us to fix it and get on with it, as there is work to be done no time to waste! We may feel like we have ants in our pants and an itch we cannot seem to scratch. I believe my friends, this is what "waking up" will feel like at times when we have been asleep for some time in areas of our embodiment. This is when our intentions to be in clear focus are in a sense tested. It is easy to stay embodied and present when what we are observing makes sense, feels controllable and moderately comfortable. It is when we want to run away due to the discomfort or disgust that there is a big shift and deep healing that is occurring within us. We just have to stay with it!
Saturn in Sagittarius and Neptune in Pisces will square again this week and this feel feel like a sobering or a cold splash of water to your face. This time calls for truth telling, a reality check, opening to the more expansive perspective, and challenging our hard held beliefs of what it is "supposed" to be like and how it really is. We cannot keep running from what is now clear as day before us despite our expectations. Saturn met us at the back door exit and he is not going to let us by this time. Saturn says we must deal with the "messiness", the pain, the unchecked fantasies, and the delusions keeping us from clarity we intend. Neptune in Pisces is where we have been hiding from our truth and our vulnerability. Where our fears and delusions have keep us separate from meeting our whole self. This is where the surrender needs to take place. We cannot battle our shadow in efforts to heal and integrate the lost parts of ourselves. Time for a truce. Time to find compassion to look at what is wounded and fearful and crying for our attention and to allow it to be healed. When we stop running and we lean into the pain, it becomes our path to wholeness, connection, and inner freedom. It is not comfortable to do this. When know we are close when we want to do what we have habitually done, hit eject and call upon our coping strategies, but the difference is now we know we have a choice. Run and maintain suffering or stay and lean in to our pain so that through our attention and care we can put the pieces back together. This time may bring sadness and grief when we realize that what we have held so tightly to was a simply a dream or that our expectations are simply impossible to fulfill, or even that we are learning the truth of impermanence in a real way. Just like every breathtaking flower must at some point die, all things must flow in cycles of death and birth. We may realize the illusion that we live in believing that we are outside of this universal truth. The gift in all of this?...the ungrounded place of being that can allow the truth to be what it is without the inner resistance and struggle to avoid facing it. We can see it, feel it and let it go. We can allow it to bring us back to our hearts to soften us to the flow of life and to the reality of the present. When we live in reality we live in the freshness of the present.
Also, noteworthy is Jupiter will join Venus in Libra on Friday. Jupiter will spend a little over a year in Libra. Jupiter is Virgo has been guiding us through a year of a deep clean up and purification. We have been note taking on what needs to go in our life and what needs to stay or be added so that we can expand our paradigm of self. Clear the path! Now in Libra, we are called into partnership. Yes, we may see an amplification of relationships with others (new ones, deepening of our current ones) but we also will also be expanding the paradigm of our own relationship with ourselves. Libra gives us the perspective of both sides, she bridges the gap created by the polarities. This is helpful when we are emerging from change and ready to start anew and move forward with what we have been digesting. We are not this and we are not that, we are something in between and a little of both. It is not black or white anymore, as the lines have been blurred. We need to remain open to see the beauty of new perspective. We see that the mind is an interesting intelligence. We can remain fixed and see what we want to see pushing away what we don't want to see. But the reality is that the truth is larger than our tunneled perspective. When we run run from what we fear impatient in the discomfort of change, we resist and push away what seems to not fit our desired reality. When we allow everything in as relevant and worthy to observe we creating a harmonious inner environment of spaciousness in which we can see the beauty in every aspect. The shadow has a important role and point to share and the light has its own. Both allow for clear sight and higher intelligence. We become allies with the self. In this intelligence we can find the underlying Truth revealed when we hear all the voices, this is our embodied wisdom. This is helpful in our relationship dynamics with others too. If we can move away from who is right and who is wrong and digging our heels in with proving what we need to have validated we become softer, more compassionate and more open hearted. We can listen and hear what the other is trying to relate and we can gain a larger perspective and come to common ground. Only when we are willing to let go of the anchor to what we believe is right is there spaciousness to float to a new place of understanding and relating.
Finding the new grooves in our cycle of patterns allows us to meet up with so much of our past and our unconscious ways of living. We meet our expectations and our rigidity and the ways we try to control the flow outcomes and our experiences. We meet our impatience at the perseverance it takes to start the new groove and to allow it gain some momentum. Remember healing is not linear and time is relative. Our minds are a bit frazzled with all this and this is not the time to reason it out (Mercury in retrograde) but rather be in your body and witness and truly experience this time. So much of the healing available is not at the level of the mind in needing to understand it but simply witness what is floating to the surface, acknowledge its presence, feel what comes with it and allow it to move through you staying grounded within your body. Know thyself and invite all the new aspects to tea as Buddha taught and observe them with a sense of compassionate curiosity. Sometimes going forward means sitting still and fully opening to what is already there and ready for your awakening. All the tools, all the fuel are within the present and within you. Finding your new groove is mostly about finding yourself in the moment and picking back up where you last left yourself and starting again. Again, again and again.
The moon this week:
Tuesday-Wednesday: Scorpio (water:merge, deep feeling); Thursday-Friday: Sagittarius (fire: expand, explore); Saturday-Sunday: Capricorn: (earth: accomplish)
Breathe deep, show love and compassion to yourself and other friends. We are not alone!