The messiness of integration
Sep
7
4:00pm 4:00pm

The messiness of integration

We are nearing the end of this Virgo cycle and wow what an intense, odd and disorienting time it has been. The eclipse certainly has left its mark and although the main event has come and gone the rippling effects will continue to be integrated into our life as the weeks progress.  I think integration is a key theme to consider for this time. The energy of this time is mutating, changing, transforming..all meaning it is being digested and broken down into aspects for us to either discard and let die and parts that will feed us to be used for growth and healing. Virgo is all about sorting and separating, useful from not necessary. This eclipse brought up inspirations and visions and creativity of what the future can hold but most of the time to get there is not as simple as we wish. We have to pause and take a look at what has been keeping us back, draining our resources and giving us those empty calories. We also have to change habits and go to work on taking new steps and forming new practices that support our heart's desires. This is the process of integration and it happens in the body through experiences and experimentation. It isn't a one move linear process. It doesn't happen solely in our minds by choice but by what we learn and experience when we live the choices. This is what makes this time so hazy and confusing. We saw the vision and we want to get "there" but the getting there is the messy and circular at times path of our journey. This is where we live the questions instead of fixate on the solution. Most of the time we don't know the solution because we have not lived the questions and the experience yet that guides us towards that destination. Virgo takes us back to our body for that filter. Instead of simply staying in the mental realm of thinking about what to do, planning, and only seeing it, we get to experience it through our physicalness. We get to feel how our choices affect us..do we like it? Does it feel authentic and grounded? During this time I have noticed myself and others feeling a lot of neck pain and digestive issues. These are all signs that the body is working on the energetic integration. We integrate on all dimensions of ourselves not just in what we know. Often times when we are feeling indigestion we are experiencing the confusing aspects of our growth and assimilation of our experiences. Often times when the neck/jaw and throat area is tight we are experiencing that integration from heart to mind and mind to heart. So, if you have felt really confused perhaps it is a gift to not be able to reason it out but to attune to the body's wisdom of how you are living it out. Incremental progress is still progress and if done at a pace in which you are able to consciously choose and respond then that is growth and evolution. 

Jupiter in Libra is opposite/polarized) to Uranus in Aries. We are experiencing the contrast of what I want and need and how my desires are pushing me to make new choices and actions that free me from conformity or inauthenticity and get me what I want. Jupiter is asking for partnering and relating with the others. How do we build bridges, negotiate and learn the art of balance of what we want and what others need and how our choices affect them? This requires experimentation and practice in skillfully observing when we error to far in any one direction. Part of how we do this is the Virgo process of sorting and separating. I first how to be able to sit in my aloneness and sense what my desires are and to know myself well in my individuality. What is truly mine and what is others? How do I feel and how do others feel about my choices? We cannot move integrated and together until we experience and know the parts first. An example is the game of Jenga. We build the pile with individual blocks (desires or aspects of our life). Let's say the pile we are building is our foundation based on what we value, what matters, and what is true. The game of Jenga (life) is then played by observing the effects of pulling out one piece at a time. How does it affect the whole? Does it make it crumble and fall, if so that piece really mattered? If it didn't, perhaps it wasn't necessary. The pieces of our live may be our work, our relationship, our home life, our personal life, etc. You get the gist. It is a game of playing with the questions of how will this choice affect the whole. That is the journey of this time.

With all this integration arising, it is a good time to love yourself and accept your path as good enough as you live your questions and your uncertainty and even your one step forward two back progress towards your inspirations. Notice the small changes and shifts and celebrate them. Congratulate yourself when you notice making a new choice or having shifts in your awareness in how you even make the decisions that you make. But also, love yourself when you don't. Evolution and growth are not easy and much as we want to improve and be our best, the best way to travel along our path with ease and patience is to practice grace with yourself, remembering our mistakes are often our post pivotal moments of awakening. 

Blessings and love to each of you...

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 Inspiring Potentialities
Aug
13
10:00pm10:00pm

Inspiring Potentialities

T minus a week until the solar eclipse and I don't know about you but the intensity dial seems to be turned up. This window between eclipses can be confusing, anxiety provoking, exciting, and un grounding. Things may already be rearranging in your life and like an animal before the storm we can all feel that something more is on the verge...inspiring potentialities. Like we have ants in our pants we want to come to a conclusion or get this sorted out and "back to normal" ASAP so we can feel that all familiar normalcy to life. But, this pivotal time is helping us re-arrange our lives so that we do just the opposite...Open to something new and take our time to enjoy living it out in a way we have never experienced before. Right now you may be experiencing change, endings,new perceptions, frustrations with status quo, a foggy confused outlook, insights, breaks in long term habits or circular patterns of behavior, bubbling up of desires previously ignored or shut down, unexplained or random body pains, old "wounds" resurfacing (physical or emotional), nausea, craving for the comfortable (food, people, circumstances), indigestion...and after listing all that I feel like I am advertizing a new drug on tv! Eclipses are times for growth and transformation. But we are energetic beings and we grow and evolve on all the layers of ourselves (body, mind, emotion, spirit and energetic) so when we are moving into new terrains our body will have an experience of taking in new energies, our emotions have to rebalance, and new thoughts will enter our mind...and that can be a lot to witness so be nice to yourself as we integrate it all. Trust your own process and know that anything goes during this time so the "out of the ordinary" is to be expected. 

Background: Last week we experienced the full moon/lunar eclipse which helped us start to move out the old and open to the new ideas and visions of what could be. We have been unlocking our potential by noticing the choices and the mind sets that keep us doing the same thing and feeling isolated from our desires and passions. Pay attention to what is flying out the door when you start to look around with new eyes on the same landscape. Look at the problems though a new lens..the lens of what will make me feel free, unbound, and alive with this same situation and that just may include letting it disappear.

Last weekend, Mercury went retrograde in the sign of Virgo. We are being asked to integrate the last 6 months especially and really our whole lives experiences. We integrate often by redoing things over and over again until we get it "right". Sometimes we choose paths that do not align over and over again even with new players but when you distill the choice, it may be the same one time and time again. Instead of beating yourself up, you can see this is simply the way we learn and grow. Repetition has a benefit.  This time is going to help you sort through what is useful for you and what is not worth the effort. Mercury rules how we are moving through life..how we learn, how we communicate, where we are we going and our relationship to the time. Look at where you waste time or don't spend enough time...the virgo archetype is about perfecting, improving and managing it all in a way that promotes well being and wholeness. Until the first week in September, take it slow...move slower, speak slower, react slower, take your time and reflect. Moving forward is not the goal..integration takes patience and consciousness. If we want to choose differently we must first know well what we are choosing and why. 

Venus opposed to Pluto and square Jupiter: Relationship drama? That can be on the docket for those of you in mid degrees of cardinal sun signs or with lots of planets in cardinal signs for sure (Aries, Libra, Capricorn and Cancer). Let's face it, relationships trigger the most growth and perhaps even the fastest growth. So, when our soul needs to evolve our relationships must evolve too. Venus in Cancer values intimacy, to establish internal security, to be taken care of emotionally, and to let the emotions frame our experiences. With Venus in this sign we can see visible signs of attachment to people that give us some of those things it desires. The trouble can be that what is comfortable and habitual does not allow us to grow often times because it may keep us like a little child..dependent on the other to have our needs met. With the Cancer archetype we can find ourselves stuck in relationship ruts. Enter Pluto to shake this up. Pluto enters boldly to break up stagnancy or power imbalances and anything in the way to our soul's desires. Pluto may introduce a new someone to the mix or he may take away someone that does not fit the new mix you need and maybe even both. Anything with Pluto is intense but suffering does not have to linger if we work with him when he shows up to the party. Pluto is directing us to put the effort and endurance on choices that allow us to show up in our power and maturity. Jupiter in Libra brings in the question of partnerships versus dictatorships. Jupiter is asking for balance in giving and receptivity. Jupiter in Libra is teaching us to form bonds with those we can trust and work together peacefully. If you are doing all the work or none of the work, this simply won't work. The eclipse may help you make shifts to move out of unhealthy relationships or into more healthy ones that allow you to: be you, love yourself and to be loved for who you are in return!

New Moon Leo/Full Solar Eclipse Monday, August 21st 11:26 am PDT: Drum roll please...What is this solar eclipse all about? It is about unleashing your passionate desires so that the uniquely, lovable you can be expressed and seen. It is about being on stage with what lights you up. It is about learning how to enjoy, how to have fun, play and go and be led from your spirit. There are unlimited potential expressions of your talents and gifts..but the treasure is found when we choose what we really love and what allows us to be full of heart when we do it. It really is OUR choice..no one can tell you how to be you better than you! This eclipse is on the North Node which deals with dharma or the path towards our potential. North Node territory is new and so we have not done this before. So if you feel confused or like you don't know what you are doing...remember like anything you are learning to do..it takes practice, patience and persistence...but all of this can still be fun! Leo is a fixed energy sign so we do not need to learn a new talent or look for a new opportunity...this is about claiming who you are, what you want and how you want to express it with what you have within you and around you NOW. It may not be perfect and complete but start where you are and let it grow. What we feed grows remember? Practice asking yourself daily, what does my spirit want now and what can I do about it today? Many people think that what comes will make them money or turn into a career and maybe that will be the case. For me dialoging and attempting to live from spirit isn't about what you get from it but how it feels within you as you do it. I can do many things that give me great results but I don't feel very invigorated by them. Feeding and unleashing your spirit lets you be in love with the experience of what you are doing and at that moment you don't really care what the results will be. Do it for the fun of it! So where are you inspired? What opportunities do you have to let those inspirations have expression now with what you have and who you are today? These are the questions of the eclipse. Don't worry you still have some time to answer them. Some Leo watch outs with this eclipse: enforcing your will to "make" it happen; needing or expecting validation from others,  looking for the truth outside yourself, basing your expressions on what others expect from you or like about you. This eclipse is harmonizing with Saturn in Sagittarius so know that what is being offered to you is a chance to express and know intimately your truth and to be authentic in who you are. Your experience has given you all the tools and cues you need! Uranus is Aries is also harmonizing this eclipse so what shifts in and opens happens fast, unexpectedly and ignites and frees your deep hidden desires. 

So, as we all eagerly anticipate this potent time remember, that the energy is aligning for us to make new conscious choices that empower us to live our creative potential. We don't need to push, go faster than we can integrate it all or feel a though we don't have a choice or that there is only "the" choice that will be delivered on a silver platter with a detailed roadmap. Pause, reflect, take a deep breathe and take it all in. Close your eyes and feel deep within you for the nudges and let them have a voice.  Then open your eyes and take in what is around you and choose what feels like the best expression in this moment. Then enjoy the ride...

Blessings and love to you all during this special time.....

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Unlock and Unleash
Aug
6
3:30pm 3:30pm

Unlock and Unleash

Oh my goodness, are we ever in an amazingly powerful time. Monday, we will experience a lunar eclipse (not visible) with our full moon and in two weeks the famous solar eclipse will arrive with the new moon in Leo. This portal between eclipses is a potent time to harness extra energy to allow rapid shifts and accelerations to occur in your life! I am calling this pair of eclipses "Unlock and Unleash". You can use the energies available to unlock the hidden parts of yourself that are essential for your spirit to emerge and unleash your own creative potential to live life in a way that ignites your heart. It is time to move on from what drags us down and closes up our heart and to open our eyes to what is ready to let us shine. When we all do this collectively we can create a new paradigm that is radiant and relevant and supportive to the whole but we each have to do our part to show up! 

Background: We are in the fire time of Leo. Leo rules heart, and is ruled by the sun. The sun is our creative potential, our highest expression of who we are as individuals. Leo energy draws us to self-expression, fun, play, taking some risks, love affairs, drama and being seen! It can be likened to the adolescent..self-centered, pleasure searching and attention seeking. Shadow side can make us a a bit selfish, lazy, and needing others to give us approval or validation. Highest expression is an ability to creatively express your spirit (give form to your authentic desires) out of the love in your heart in a way that touches the world around you (joyfully offering your talents in love). 

Full Moon in 15 degrees Aquarius/Lunar Eclipse "Unlock": On Monday at 11:11a PST our moon is full in the sign of Aquarius. A full moon is opposite (polarized) to the Sun in Leo. The sun in Leo is conjoined (merged) with Mars (our will/primal desires) in Leo and the North Node( Dharma) in Leo. So the we have a lot of extra zest to this firey energy wanting us to express ourselves in a way that lights our heart on fire and expands us. We may feel during this time a lot of desires that have bubbled up for expression. We may find that we need to start acting out in ways that really reveal who we are at our core whether through how we interact, how we dress, what we say, who we want to spend time with and what we want to spend time doing! If we are not letting our desires have this expression then we may find ourselves feeling angry or frustrated, resorting to blame on the external, exploiting our creativity by channeling it towards pleasure that is shallow and unfulfilling (the temporary high that appeases the body but not the spirit). With the Sun and Mars in a trine to Saturn and Lilith in Sagittarius this creative expression must be honoring our truth and the totality of who we are (not just what we like about ourselves but also what we do not like as it has a purpose too). It is not about expressing what has been done or what others have done that you could repeat but being you and expressing you and doing it the way that feels good to you that honors your experience. It is about being truthful with what is you and what is not you. It is about going deeper in to meet your path instead of spreading out the search to find it outside of yourself.  The moon in Aquarius is bringing to our awareness what expressions of ourselves are not truthful but honestly binding. Aquarius is ruled by Uranus which is in the sign of Aries ( individual desires). Uranus is freedom from the norm. It is also about community and groups/associations. With Aquarius the theme  is unity in diversity. Shadow side is expression of the self based on what others like or what the "in" crowd does..needing to fit yourself in. Highest expression is a detachment from needing the follow the group and being uniquely yourself (as odd and as quirky as that may be) and yet making a valuable contribution to the group in what you can offer from Truth. The moon is conjoined with the S Node of the moon which deals with our past and our karma. The moon is all about our habits and what we do unconsciously. On this new moon we get may be illuminations of how our habits have been keeping us locked into patterns that don't serve our highest expression. Uranus is about liberation and higher mind awareness. We may get a break from the emotional weight that would feed more of the same based on being comfortable, staying with what we know and with ignoring our call to wake up! So on this full moon/eclipse some ideas to ponder:

What do I do because others need it/like it/expect it that feels meaningless to me or weighs me down?

What parts of myself do I keep hidden because I feel it makes me odd or unlikeable?

What is rapidly disappearing from my past or feeling void of heart in my life that I can allow to be released?

When we move outside our habits of relating and creating we can create the space to identify what we have to give as far as our talents/gifts and what we want to offer that feeds our heart and the heart of the receiver. The truth is that when we offer out of obligation/expectation no one really receives what they truly need. And very often what makes us feel odd and unlikeable is just what we need to love enough to bring to the light to help us reveal more about our unique talents and what we have to offer. For example, a struggle with relationships may lend me to experiences and to learn practices that allow me the opportunities to serve others as a coach or to provide insight in what has served me in my path. Uranus acts like a lightning bolt of energy to create rapid change, chaos and liberation. So with this eclipse, pay attention to what flies out the door when you unlock insight into who you are as a whole being (dark and light). Whatever wants to leave...let it go peacefully. It is preparing space for what is about to be unleashed...And remember we are dealing with fixed energy which means we are being asked to stabilize and capitalize on what we have now. This time is not about searching for something you need to learn or attain but opening your mind to what has been right inside and  beside you all along..but you just weren't ready to see it!

Mercury Retrograde in Virgo: This Saturday, Mercury goes retrograde in the earth sign of Virgo. It will station (stop) at 11 degrees and go back to 28 degrees Leo before turning direct. Mercury rules the mind, communication, brothers/sisters, learning and your immediate environment. So when this planet appears to move backward we try to allow those tasks that he manages to slow down. This is a time for review, reflection and this is done internally so give yourself time and space to do this. Virgo rules our work environment, the body but also our health and wellness, it rules digestion. Often times we see the results of our life's choices in our health (could see digestive unrest) in physical ways so that we pay attention to the messages we are ignoring. When we slow down we can connect to our bodies more readily to feel how well we are taking care of our vehicles of our spirit, to listen to our thoughts, and to learn how best to create wellness in all areas of our life. It doesn't do any good to make a million dollars when you are not healthy enough to enjoy it. This is a time to explore how well we are digesting our experiences. Are we moving too fast to truly take it the full body experience of our reality and to live life embodied not just in our heads planning the next move? Do we allow time for integration of the lessons that are before us? Are you choosing work that feeds you or does it leave you hungry for something more satisfying. Virgo is the analyzer so take time to truly find what in your life is providing the nutrients and what is empty calories. What kind of diet does your mind enjoy? What lessons keep coming your way because there has not been a focus on slowing down and allowing for integration. We will fall off the bike as many times as we need to before we learn to ride. Sometimes we must standstill and take a step back in order to make a big step forward. 

Highlights for this time:

-Acknowledge your desires and find creative ways of expression

-Feed your heart with the activities and people that make you feel alive

-Take time to reflect and to hear your wisdom

-Be open to new ideas and insight with what you have and who you are now

-This is not a great time for big decisions and moves as the energy is very chaotic and much is changing moment to moment. After the eclipse more will make sense.

-Take good care of your body and your spirit. Change can be stressful. Give yourself space and patience. Routines of self-care can help us stabilize when we feel off. 

Happy full moon and eclipse friends!

 

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Armchair Reflection #3: Receptivity's Presents
Jun
25
11:00am11:00am

Armchair Reflection #3: Receptivity's Presents

These series of reflections are inspired by my unexpected injury in Trinidad and Tobago that has caused me to bound to my arm chair leg propped up and still for the time being and forced to relate to reality differently. I hope these reflections inspire you to open your mind to new ways to invite in the present. 

The act of receiving has been forced upon me during this healing process. It has baffled me that one of my favorite acts to bestow upon others has been my nemesis during my recovery. Since I cannot stand up for very long, I have had to receive others help in bringing food and groceries. Since I cannot drive, I have had to ask for rides. Since, I am not working as much I cannot escape out of this vulnerability by requesting an Uber or Lyft due to financial restrictions. One of the most uncomfortable weeks for me was when my mother came to take care of me. Crazy that we all love a mother's care and no one does it better than Mama yet I watched my independent, self-sufficient ego become so annoyed at having to ask for help and having to receive so much of it. Normally when friends ask "What can I do" I can proudly say "Nothing". Well, during this time, I have had to swallow this silly pride and say, "I need help with ....". I have accepted services, money, food, rides and more in this last month than in perhaps the last 10 years! Why is this so hard for me psychologically?

I relate this struggle back to cultural overly dominant masculine conditioning of doing more than being or receiving, and that self-sufficiency= maturity, responsibility and capability. If I have my shit in order I will not need help. If I need help then I am weak or incapable. Why do I buy into this dogma? Because I think we are validated in doing for others or being "good". A "good" person gives more, does more and since we are awarded and recognized by what we do it in the end makes us feel good about ourselves. I am validated because you need me and therefore I have a place. I love giving my time and talents in support of another. In fact I thrive off of it. It fills my heart to help another in need or to offer something to let another feel loved. It has certainly fed my "worthiness" tank. What I have noticed about this journey into receiving is that it feels good too. It felt so humbling, vulnerable and yet sweet to realize that people care for me. That people would offer their time, resources and talents for me. I immediately wanted to respond to this offering by planning how I would "pay them back" but I noticed when I did that it took away from that delicate feeling of being loved. It made it smaller or downplayed it like a game of tit for tat. When I was really able to just open towards this tenderness of receiving, I noticed how it made the other person feel. I felt the love and joy that inspired them to give in the first place. That in trying to trade off or escape the moment of receiving I would also diminish their receptivity of joy as well as my own. How vulnerable it feels to admit that I cannot do it all myself and that I need another's hand but the hand and the support that was extended allowed for a momentary pause in my conditioning to reframe my storyline of purpose. My purpose was to receive and I was not weaker or incapable, but blessed!

It made me realize that when another gives in the pureness of love and appreciation of me that I receive the joy of being in a moment of connecting to the other person's worthiness as vessel for love and abundance. And when I can allow myself to be on the other end and openly receive that love and abundance I too can give another the opportunity to see their validation of my worthiness. So, in the end this practice of receptivity has been so healing, perhaps even for all of us but especially me. I have experienced community and family that is beyond blood/family and obligations. I have softened to the concept that maybe I can be present with an aspect of worthiness that needs no response other than being willing to let it in. In just pausing and meeting fully my needs without rushing to fill them or ignore them I have given myself an opportunity to experience the present without my active nature taking over.   In meeting the moment and not struggling to define it by what makes me comfortable I have allowed the moment to comfort me in new and beautiful ways. Thank you dear friends who have taught me what it means to be enough, to feel loved and how to open to receptivity.

 

 

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Inner Resources
Jun
22
9:30am 9:30am

Inner Resources

Oh how quickly the energy shifts these days?! We have moved from the flighty, adaptable, and mind provoking air energy of Gemini to watery, touchy/feely, sensitive and flowing energy of Cancer. All this change in one week and to boot we experienced Summer Solstice and tomorrow a new moon. SO much to feel and absorb and reflect with. We may want to find a place to hide out in safety..but that is exactly what not to do according to the astrology of the times. We are experiencing the end of victimhood and the commencement of being responsible for our wellbeing not only physically and mentally but emotionally. We are to direct the ship using new found inner resources and even if the waters feel choppy and stormy, we cannot give up our captain's hat! We can find safety within and trust our crew the strong forces within us guiding our path. 

We moved into the cardinal (initiating, directing) water sign of Cancer Tuesday. Cancer deals with our emotions and is ruled by the moon. During this month we feel our experiences and how we respond to them emotionally and internally. We desire emotional security and want to feel safe and at home with whatever arises in our life. We want to take care of ourselves and may desire that others/life follow suit. Our energy may fluctuate quite a bit likes waves in an ocean. We notice the relationship with flow. Emotions we enjoy flow in and out and all too often emotions we do not enjoy flow though us and hopefully out as well but that is not always the case.  Our strong desire to hold onto emotions that feel safe and cozy with a death grip can present resistance to the natural flow of yin/yang, the reality of life. We can also hold onto uncomfortable emotions with resistance to how they make us feel as they make us feel vulnerable and out of control. We may think that feeling these uncomfortable emotions makes us weak. The gift of Cancer is truly learning to tolerate all of our emotions and allow them to "tenderize" us. In our sensitivity, we awaken the gift of intuition, of connecting to others through empathy and through a felt sense of what is present. This new sensitivity is crucial in the new paradigm/new earth. Being tough and hard only strengthens the old way of the patriarch with power, fear and physical forms of safety. We can attain all the physical security we need (job, money, home) and feel completely insecure with what is happening inside ourselves and within our psyche. We can use these outer forms to control and meter others and our risk to falling prey to hurt or pain but we will find time and time again, that the real power is not in any of these forms but in the form to find power within and through the toleration of any experience.  It is like a child afraid of the dark. In the dark, we can make us stories of what is there and live in fear of what is when if we turn on the light, we see that there was nothing to fear other than the fear itself. Within the strength and vulnerability to feel it all the way through and to trust ourselves to take care of ourselves (create an inner safety oasis) we allow ourselves to be able to survive what is using the power of our inner guidance. We develop trust in ourselves different from reliance on others or situations to make us "safe".

The solar system is really pressing us towards aligning with our truth, our inner power and intuition and trusting ourselves to guide the path and not relying on others for the answers. This can be so uncomfortable, like we are being thrown out of the nest in a sense. This is not to let us fall and die but to remember we are capable of flying and flying gives us a bird's eye view of our life and the experiences we are facing. 

Jupiter in Libra is recently out of retrograde has been teaching us about the balance of giving and taking and the partnerships in which we are aligning ourselves with. How to we evolve them into allowing us to learn the essential skills of sharing and peace making? How do we stop going to war and create  the energy to find a solution outside polarity (right/wrong, black/white,). How do we allow ourselves to ask for help and not always place the burden on ourselves to do it all? How do we see others in need and step in instead of "every man for himself"? Jupiter is squaring Pluto in Capricorn ( working to transform authority, the old paradigm of power in the few, control, forms of outer restraint and control). The only way to break down the old way is to use the energy it holds as power to start new forms of power that will stand the test of time and will serve more people for longer (including yourself). Relying on the power of partnership won't be perfect but it should be a heck of a lot easier than the struggle to always be on top for fear of what if. 

Saturn in Sagittarius is a call to our truth and to making decisions to be in our life in a way that is authentic. It is choosing the path that is 100% our own. We may be facing a lot of difficulties and struggle if we are not choosing this path. Saturn is a stern hand that says no and closes the doors of the rooms that are too small for us. Saturn is square Chiron in Pisces. This is our wounds and our tendencies to say I am injured, I have been hurt, look at my wounds, look what X did to me? We are to feel these battle wounds as evidence that we are living and that life is unpredictable but the wounds are not causes to sit and drown in our tears but to make us more soft and open to the present. Use your scars as motivation and inspiration to find ways to be larger and stronger than you thought. The old saying what doesn't kill us makes us stronger...it has some truth unless you use the wound to disable you and tell a story of weakness. Not getting dirty doesn't mean you are the best, it may mean you are not living in full capacity. Saturn wants you at your highest potential. Chiron is giving you the medicine to place on the salve that would hold you back. Our wounds tell  us how to heal and how to realize our divine potential for regeneration. Lilith in Sagittarius is where we suppress and stow away our truth and judgement and our  deep well of wisdom (our experiences)  and she is square off to retrograde Neptune in Pisces. In order to see the bigger picture, the outer space view of all of life, the meaning behind it all, to find the wisdom that in the pulse of all life...we have to free ourselves of smaller living, of victimhood and of thinking that if we are a voice of truth different from the times or one another or consensus that we need to go hide our light. The truth is freedom is scary because it isn't bound, it has space and it can go anywhere at anytime. We say want this but rarely do we understand what true freedom means because we have been a slave to forces other than it for too long. Neptune reminds us of the freedom of our unlimited potential to create and dream up our own reality and reminds us that we are doing it whether we know it or not. So no one else can dream up your reality better than you so take the paint brush back and start painting your own desires. 

Friday night we welcome a new moon in Cancer. This lunar cycle is all about FEELINGS and letting what is in the dark of our psyche come into the light through our consciousness. What are you feeling? How do your choices feel inside you opposed to how they look? Fake diamonds sparkle too. What are you afraid of? What needs to be comforted? How can you own your comfort? How can you take steps to assuage your fears? They will not go away but you can do what you can to meet them properly resourced. What does your sensitivities allow you to see about yourself, others, and situations? When you let your guard down what is available for you to sense that is not there when you stay in control? Let your point of observation be elevated beyond what you can see with your eyes but also what you can feel with your intuition and emotions. There is more information available. There are more advanced ways to connecting to yourself and others. Cancer will be our teacher to hone in these deep skills so we can be the great mother and protector of ourselves and each other..not that no one will ever challenge us but that we know how to take the best care of ourselves when crisis arrives. We can have our home unshaken internally even when our physical home undergoes a remodel. 

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ARMCHAIR REFLECTION #2: "Pointless" Presence
Jun
16
12:30pm12:30pm

ARMCHAIR REFLECTION #2: "Pointless" Presence

These series of reflections are inspired by my unexpected injury in Trinidad and Tobago that has caused me to bound to my arm chair leg propped up and still for the time being and forced to relate to reality differently. I hope these reflections inspire you to open your mind to new ways to invite in the present. 

I never noticed how busy and distracted I was with life until I wasn't. One of the most challenging stages of my injury is the presence of the non-doing aspect of my existence. Some days the only thing I have to do is go to the doctor. Other days I get to go to the studio and teach a class seated and immobile (contrary to what I prefer). I get small doses of doing and giving but not the quantity I feel comfortable with. So much of my day is sitting and doing really nothing at all (atleast nothing I deem "productive").  It is interesting to allow this into my presence as I push it away so readily eagerly seeking something to "do". I notice upon meeting this "non-doing" that I feel guilt. I am not really helping anyone, performing a job, contributing, or feeding my "busyness". In fact I am doing the opposite, I am receiving a lot. 

I also notice the non-doing leading me to feeling worthless at times. What is the point to my day? What is the excitement in waking up to sit around and watch the day go by? What is there to look forward to? Again, I notice an anxious feeling that I want so desperately to feed with some "doing".  This worthlessness at times makes it hard to take the necessary care of my injury that it asks for. Am I worthy of just allowing this time for myself to heal and provide self care (doing for self) and let that by my doing? This is an different way of doing that is outside my norm. 

It makes me pause to see how much of my day is filled and gratified by a presence that  allows mainly for external "doing".  In that reality the objective is then is to "do" the thing and then to "do" the next thing and it never ends. I notice that this can keep me more future focused, planning the next thing or going to the next place in never arriving into this moment. In my sitting and non-doing, now the tables are turned. I am squared up to  the present and in this place there is a lot of space and ambiguity. No control and no certainty.  If my current "point" is not to do something am I really "pointless" or is this fixation with "doing" an escape route for the present. In this present I have to meet all that is occurring around me without my participation. I am an observer and my ego is smaller. If I cannot latch onto the next "thing" then I must be able to sit in spaciousness of the vastness that is way bigger than me. I think this is why we avoid the present so much. It gives us a view of reality that we aren't and all this doing is not the end all be all and what do we do with that? I am sitting still and doing nothing and the earth is still spinning, day and night are still occurring and the birds are still chirping, It begets a larger question that need not be answered but possibly just observed and allowed to pass along. I hope to find a way to find more peace in this present moment of just being. Perhaps it is the path to healing the guilt and worthiness wounds that never really heal from our external doing. Maybe this struggle and surrender is to open me to include myself in the vastness of life that is way more than just doing. Maybe the present is way fuller that I imagined.

 

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Armchair Reflection #1: No Time for Signs
Jun
13
8:30pm 8:30pm

Armchair Reflection #1: No Time for Signs

These series of reflections are inspired by my unexpected injury in Trinidad and Tobago that has caused me to bound to my arm chair leg propped up and still for the time being and forced to relate to reality differently. I hope these reflections inspire you to open your mind to new ways to invite in the present. 

It is a little before 5am and after a quick night's sleep I am rushing out the door to be driven to the airport. Of course, I woke up at the last possible moment so that I could get every last drop of sleep before I sit for 14 hours of travel (one must be well rested for all that sitting). I have barely rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and I am dressed, packed up and attempting to catch my international flight which leaves in 2 hours (mind you I am 30 minutes from the airport). This is the American way right..get there right in time with no time to waste. This would be a successful mission, right? As I am rushing to hand my suitcase to the driver, I fail to notice the 4 foot deep by 2 foot wide large drainage ditch that runs alongside the road and directly in my path to the car. The next thing I know I am being pulled out of the ditch, bleeding, and in shock at the huge gaping hole in my shin. How did this happen? How did I not see the hole?  Why was there not a sign to warn me or better yet grating over the hole to protect me? This would also be the American way..signs everywhere so you don't have to think and pay attention for yourself,,rely on the sign to tell you what to see and what not do do. There was no sign to tell me to watch out for a large hole, how inconvenient. I also notice, there was nothing to protect me and keep me safe from my inability to be aware of my surroundings. How rude of them to expect me to first of all pay attention to where I was going and then to be responsible for keeping my body and my mind in the same location simultaneously. How can I possibly manage this with the little time I gave myself and in the midst of my race with time to the airport? Now, all sarcasm aside,  I am not stating that a sign or grating would not be a great investment of money in Trinidad, but where does my accountability land? Now, I am human and we all make mistakes and I am not trying to blame myself for this unfortunate accident. But, in all honesty, I do have some accountability to own that can possibly allow me to make some sense of a dark event in my timeline. I failed to take the time to be in that moment fully so that I could be aware of my body, my state of mind, and observant to the environment in which I was experiencing the moment in. Part of me was still asleep, part of me was worrying if my time calculations would get me there on time, part of me was annoyed that I had not had coffee before leaving, and perhaps another part of me wondered why I had chosen to stay so damn far from the airport...and so on. This fractured presence can work when we have signs that we can rely on to remind us temporarily to pay attention and when we have protective measures in place so we can stay unaware and make mistakes and never be the wiser. But, how do we learn to transition to full presence then when this reality is changed, like when you are in a foreign county or any new place? What alerts us to turn on our alertness radar when we have made a habit of never leaving time for it? I have to wonder what would have happened if I had set my alarm clock for  30 minutes earlier. Would I have taken the time to fully wake up? Would I have taken the measures I know I need to be alert? Would I have slowed my pace a little since there was no need to rush to the airport? Would I have taken my time walking to the car? Would I have perhaps noticed the temperature outside, if the birds were singing, if there were cars on the road, if the sunrise was occurring, and even what the ground was like that my feet were standing on...all that the moment offered that I was simply too rushed to notice. The moment is happening now. I wonder how I can take my own responsibility for how I choose to show up for it? I can rely on the external to remind me and keep me in check or I trust that when I fully arrive into it, I will have plenty of time to choose where I am step forth. 

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Heaven and Hell
May
9
4:00pm 4:00pm

Heaven and Hell

The currents of energy this week are anything but predictable, stable and calming like our Taurus Sun has been radiating. The planetary soup is going to have some kick with flavors of depth and contrast to wake up our pallet. It can feel a bit like taking a trip from Heaven to Hell with a rave dance party of polarity and dualism. The rub will be not to get lost in either pole but to taste the flavor of each and let your tongue distinguish the gifts each bestow. I guess the question becomes how do find a piece of heaven in hell and allow hell into our heaven? Blasphemous or ingenious? 

We start the week with Mercury (recently out of retrograde but still in the retrograde zone) conjoining with Uranus in Aries. These two meet and fireworks transpire. Expect some breakthroughs, eruptions, epiphanies and some energy to be expressed through the communications channel. You may notice yourself voicing some long awaited messages that need to get out. Some may be pretty and some may not but this energy needs an outlet. Be careful for discord and heated arguments as some of this buried communication pushes to the surface. Let the words, thoughts, and ideas flow and give it an outlet that feels most appropriate. Communications this week will have extra fire this week and this fire wants to reveal more about your deep, instinctual desires.

Wednesday is a big day this week. The nodes of the moon (South Node=karma and North Node=Dharma) move from Pisces/Virgo into Aquarius and Leo. This is a big shift for how are processing and integrating our past and moving into our future. We are moving into a time play, passion, and self-expression. We will need to have access to what is going on in our hearts to step into this place. We cannot move from a place of external motivation and impersonal desires as this will be a calling from the mind (be it higher mind or not). We are re-connecting to our own intuition and personal desires that need expression for us to fulfill our creative potential. And boy do we ever need some love and creativity in this world?! We can serve because we know it is needed and we know what we have the "answers" for how and we can serve humanity by being our most authentic version of ourselves and trusting that also has its value in service to the whole. Both are service but one will feed our hearts along the way.

On this day too at 2:42pm PST the moon is full in Scorpio. Sun in Taurus is a taste of heaven on earth with its call to the body and care of this physical vessel,  discovery of worthiness within ourselves, and the sensual delights of the material world.  This zone sounds so lovely, right? Why leave? Because we get stuck. We habituate only towards what is pleasurable and we never want to leave our house! Picture: comfy sofa, warm fire, beverage and food of choice, favorite Netflix show released all at once..chances of leaving? Slim, right? But, there is a world out there to explore and we don't do much evolving and growing keeping to ourselves and staying super comfortable in fact we get kinda bored after a while. Scorpio is the polarity of Taurus. If Taurus's territory is the physical, Scorpio's is the psychological world of our deep emotions, buried deep in the psyche. Scorpio doesn't care much about stillness and harmony as its game is intensity and probing to get to the truth no matter how many stones need to be overturned. The best way to do this? The interactions of with those in which the glue is power. We use our methods to steal it, keep it and squash another's attempt to take it from us..all the while learning that the true mastery comes from owning and keeping our power inside and re-stocking it by using our emotions to guide us to where we are leaking it. Scorpio takes us to our fear places and where we bury the shadow aspects of ourselves that we devalue because we think it makes us ugly. The truth is that our shadow makes us whole. If we only shine the light on all the sparkles we get an incomplete picture. If we only do what is safe and reliable we rob our selves of the joy of discovery of the unchartered waters of what lies within our potential. And our potential will always be the alchemy of our shadow and our light. The profane has a purpose and it is no less spiritual than what we believe to be our gifts.  The real spirituality exists when we see no distinction between in who we are whether we are experiencing heaven or hell. There is unity, potential, and unlimited creative capacity within our experiences within both.

Thursday, Neptune in Pisces forms a T-square with Mars in Gemini and Lilith in Sag. Mars will call us to explore, network, adapt, learn..be open and fresh in our minds. Lilith will bring out the shadow sides to our discernment. We may want to throw out truth or ideas about ourselves that we feel are meaningless and inconsequential because it evokes some fear or caused unsettling experience when we let it out into the light. Maybe our experience of ourselves with that shadow aspect was not the point but rather what we learned about ourselves. For example, maybe the relationship from hell we had with another revealed a desire that has gone unnoticed. Maybe the job that stole our zest for life wasn't the answer but the inspiration that drew us towards it is what needs to be recaptured.   It isn't about the person or the relationship or the thing but rather the aspect of ourselves that wants to be expressed and validated by ourselves. Neptune is Pisces give us the gray zone of not either or but both and more. Another way of saying it..it is all spiritual. It is all born of the same. In this time of rekindling our heart's desires, breaking free of what has before held us hostage, and entering a new "garden of eden", it is essential that we include what we have learned about ourselves through the "hell" we have experienced with others and the powerless situations we have experienced. In any real heaven, we must bring in the reality that there is no heaven without a hell to balance the scales and allow us to integrate the parts of us that come to the surface within each reality. This weeks begs us to let those two worlds collide with a little less resistance.

Let's traverse through our heavens and hells together dear ones. We cannot do it alone and we don't have to..thank goodness. Peace and love...

 

 

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 Unwavering Resolve
Apr
24
9:30pm 9:30pm

Unwavering Resolve

We have settled down into Taurus energy now and things may feel a bit more stable and grounded for the moment. We have entered fixed earth energy that wants to concentrate and distribute in material forms. All the sparks of inspiration, action, and new beginnings that we experienced in March now have settled into some observable forms for us to tend to. What we feed grows. We get a chance during this next lunar cycle to be more present and deliberate in how we are feeding that which we want to continue to grow and cultivate while noticing what weeds also are growing in our garden. This is where the invitation lies, not to continue to feed energy into pathways that keep us stuck in our ruts and habits. It is easy to feed our habits because they are routine and familiar. It is easy to feed those negative thoughts, worries, fears as well if we don't realize that time, attention and energy towards them allows them also to grow. Aries moves fast and allows for quick uncensored action. Taurus comes next to allow us to stabilize these new forms of energy so they can be sustained. We need the resolve to conquer the obstacles we previously have faced and this is the time to muster up the energy to do it with patience, presence and intention. A new moon in 6 degrees Taurus Wednesday morning (5:16am) is the time to focus your TEA (time/energy/attention) on your garden. What weeds need to be pulled or ignored?  What needs your unwavering focus?

We still have 4 planets in retrograde (Mercury, Saturn, Jupiter and now Pluto). This is pulling us towards reflection, rethinking, re-focusing, rebirth..we are taking closer look into what we thought we were finished with or where we thought we were going. This is crucial if we really are ready to make changes that serve our truth and our expansion. It is too easy to fall back into the past, the old ways and the familiar if we are not careful and observant.  This reflective time slows us down a bit so that we don't fail to notice what beckons for more attention or even what is inadvertently getting our attention. Retrograde Mercury started in Taurus with us observing what is materializing due to our thoughts. If we feed our worries and our fears, they tend to show up. If we are feeding our desires and our inspirations, then we should see that materializing as well. Whatever is showing up in your world is evidence of what you are feeding, as Mercury moved back into Aries you get the chance to start again if the 1st course didn't please the pallet. On Friday, Mercury will catch up with Uranus again allowing us to break free of mental constraints. We can free our mind when we feed it nutrient rich material and give it space. Let your mind wander away from the what ifs that feed more fears and debilitating thoughts and instead towards what sets you free and give you room to wear some new shoes. Venus is moving out of Pisces Friday and back into Aries so whatever matters of the heart (relationships especially) that came up for healing and release are ready to be replaced with new heart felt desires. New relationships and new ways in which you embody what you value are ready to be claimed. 

Mars, planet of action, is now In Gemini and square the nodes of the moon (karma vs dharma). If we want to move out of what we know and where we have been and into our growth and potential then we have to adapt, change, and make fresh choices. This takes a lot of presence and interaction with the environment. Making new choices may mean observing what choices are available other than we we cling to. Forming new habits require a fresh look at what is present in each moment for interaction. Be open to new faces, new places and new spaces for opportunity intertwined within the familiar.

Sunday, Saturn in Sagittarius is square Chiron in Pisces. Our wounds, our fears and our pain can keep us hiding out in what we feel will protect us from anything that may hurt in the future. Chiron is allowing us to feel these tender places and dark shadows so that we know they exist. We cannot ignore these places and at the same time we cannot surrender to them as our fate. Saturn is directing us towards growth and expansion and ultimately towards what is true for us. Part of this process is revealing the obstacles that have previously been road blocks. Not so that we turn around and go home when we meet them, but so that we find a new path. There may not be a short cut but there is always a path to somewhere. If you don't know where you are going then any path will get you there. If you know where to want to go than there are paths that lead you closer and ones that turn you away. Now is the time to determine which path you want to take..the road back to the past and familiar or the road to the new frontier.  Each path requires effort and you have to do the work to traverse. Each destination has a much different feel. In Taurus we pay attention to the senses. How do our commitments feed our senses and do they delight us? What we feed grows so might as well grow something that tastes delightful!

Love to you all....

 

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You are not alone
Apr
9
9:30pm 9:30pm

You are not alone

We start the week off with a full moon in Libra and Mercury recently stationing retrograde in the sign of Taurus, and that is not all! We have powerful, electric, Aries energy sparking some disruption, change and perhaps some chaos in the attempts for freedom to express who we are. We also have big heart healing and old wounds from the past coming up for our love so that we can move forward into the direction of our truth and purpose. This is a big time for all of us! Big, impactful and paramount changes are happening so that we can grow. The message of this full moon: You are not alone!

We have been in the time of Aries, connecting to our deep heartfelt desires. Sparking  action and choices that support what we value and align with. We have been learning where we need to say "Yes" and where we may need to say "No". We have been called to connect to our instincts and to channel our vital energies towards actions that are purposeful and meaningful.  This has been a time to ask "What do I want? and "What do I need to do now?". It is easy to get lost in me, my and mine with this archetype. Within this archetype is the need to find one's self and to explore how we are letting our spirit penetrate into this world. We can go too far and become self-absorbed to the depths that we feel isolated and alone. We may see the mountain and wonder, how will I ever summit this giant? We may feel that we have it all figured out only to find that we are running out of gas. But, we can also experience the fears that we encounter when change and disruption present themselves and feel very alone is this crazy and unpredictable world. Uranus, the ruler of chaos, change, the unusual, and the genius revealer will conjoin the Sun this week. The great liberator will give more power to those urges to break out of the norm and to be uneasy doing the same thing that you have been doing. He is waking us up to ourselves. This can be like a cold splash of water on the face upon awakening. You need be you because no body else will do it the way you will. And you cannot be you doing it the way anyone else it. 

The full moon, in Libra is giving another side to this "all about me" story. We are not inhabiting an island here. We are playing the game and despite how it feels sometimes, we are playing it together. Everyone and everything in your immediate world and even the more external world is not random but purposeful to you and your growth and thus to our collective purpose and growth. We have many mirrors. The truth of who you are has many aspects and many of them are best seen in the eyes of those peering back at you. Libra is about peacemaking, dispelling polarity, learning how to trust, and how to partner with yourself, each other and life. Learning how to trust means letting your guard down at times, experimenting outside your comfort zone, and most of all letting another into your world. Sometimes it works brilliantly and sometimes not so much. None the less our experiences teach us how we relate to ourselves when we see our flaws and how we respond to another's flaws. The bottom line is that we all have them. We all have those rough edges and leave it to a relationship to bring these to the surface. Aries can seem like it is too independent for relationships or that it needs no other, but that simply isn't the case. Without each other we would not be able to witness our emergence of spirit into the earth through another's perception and feedback. We learn about ourselves by watching other's responses to us. Even if the only intimacy we know is combat with others, this too is a form of intimacy. So, we need each other to even see and learn about ourselves clearly as uncomfortable as this can be at times. Every person in your life embodies something inside you, that you have yet to cultivate into expression and other traits that lie hidden in your shadow. Reflecting on this we need each other to be who we are. So that means that we cannot be alone because we would lack the necessary balance required to complete our exploration into ourselves. This can be helpful to remember when the feelings of defeat, fear, or even anger and frustration come in on a full moon, we can learn to hold their hands and respect them as a witness to the balance required in becoming more aligned with Self. 

Pluto has been bringing his normal intensity of transformation though destruction of what has been a false facade of your wisdom. Your wisdom is gained by your own experience. Through all the trials and tribulations you tried like hell to avoid yet happened anyway. These events bore witness to a false God you were serving or a false Self you were looking for in all the wrong places. Pluto in Capricorn takes away the authorities whose power actually took away yours because it required you to neglect your heart and hold firm to beliefs that could not withstand the test of time. In this full moon, take a moment to feel the people that let you down, perhaps this was their role so that you would not stray any further from the self that you need be. Take a moment to reflect on the power figures that turned false leading you to find more updated models of truth, and most of all so that you could see what the truth did not look like embodied. These people you needed to0, they helped you grow and transform. 

Lastly, on this Full Moon Venus in Pisces conjunct Chiron is square Saturn in Sagittarius. These are the wounds that we are feeling in our hearts. Perhaps inflicted from lovers of the past,it is where we feel the deep grief that cuts so deep that we feel separate from Source, each other, and even ourselves. Sometimes pain causes us to tense up and guard our hearts so that we don't have to feel this pain again. But, our guarding only leads to more separation and loneliness and we lock in the pain and keep the love from flowing. It is so easy to see the other as the source of our pain, the culprit, but in truth the other just exposed the pain that was already hidden within us. So, as hard as it is to forgive and see, we needed those partners that broke open our hearts so that we could see our wounds,  mend them with our own love and compassion, leaving scars that remind us that we survived and that we are still loveable and worthy despite the battle wounds. When we stay open, we see that we all have battle wounds. We recognize pain exists in all of us, we actually are united in this truth. We can let another see our vulnerabilities without feeling less than and we can see others without judging them as less than. We don't have to stay in relationships that have worn out their purposes but we can honor the impact of those relationships in our growth and the people that were the sparks of maturity in action moving us towards the more fuller expression of embodied truth with another.

So, on this full moon, stop and reflect on those in the past that led you to where you are now, especially those that played the harder roles of waking you up and redirecting your course. You were never alone then, the universe was matching you perfectly with whomever you needed at the time. We must trust them that who is showing up now has a role too and best of all you have a role to play for them in their growth. We are not alone. We are here for each other. So when the going gets tough don't buy the lies that you are alone, but open your eyes and listen and see who the cosmos has brought your way to help you along your journey. 

Love to you all on this full moon!

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"Why's" Action
Apr
3
8:00pm 8:00pm

"Why's" Action

Wow..this Aries energy has us buzzing with inspiration, determination and drive but get ready because at the end of this week half the planets will be in retrograde. Translation? Things will slow down  and we may have to cool our jets a bit. This current energy has been exhilarating in some ways..finding courage to finally pull the trigger on some projects, saying what we really want out loud, empowering ourselves to make steps forward..It can be a rush but it only lasts for little bit before we can burn out. We have conditioned ourselves though in this culture to disregard burnout. We just add another cup of coffee or stay up a little longer and take some supplements to counteract the stress or squeeze one more thing in our packed schedule and skip the self care and Oila we can keep going. We don't want to feel like we cannot make it in a competitive society. Who has time to rest and slow down when there is so much to do? Right? We have all had these inner battles. The retrograde planets want us to reflect on the whys and hows we are doing what we are doing and if we can have the patience to dig in a bit, I think we may can do all that we are inspired to do differently and more sustainably. 

Jupiter has been in retrograde since February (seems like forever ago right) in the sign of Libra. Jupiter is asking us to pause and reflect on how we are doing what we are doing. Do we tend to do it all by ourselves and over give, over commit, over do, and carry the world on our shoulders? Or, do we take too much and are we waiting for the job to land in our lap, are we too dependent on the other or the situation or on playing it safe? Jupiter is Libra is teaching us balanced partnering. We are learning to be receptive do-ers and active receivers. We are learning to balance the masculine and the feminine within ourselves, the yin and the yang. We are gaining perspectives within our relationships that helps us see where we are out of balance. Sink into your current relationships: What are you giving and what are you getting? How does that balance serve you, and how does it serve the other? Friday, the sun in Aries will oppose Jupiter. We are torn between two sides: Start and assert your will to follow your desires and the call that there may be another way of doing it rather than the same ways you always have. What if there was a middle path or a path that allowed for support, more listening, not carrying the load alone but yet expanding the  impact by allowing in your magnetic powers that will call forth that which aligns with your desires? These planets will square Pluto in Capricorn. We are gaining mastery on our power sources and where we leak our power to the other. Where the shoulds take over the place of our hearts. Where traditions and the way we were told harden us from the courage to do it a new way, a way more aligned with our intuition. Any decision devoid of the heart will not fulfill you. 

Venus has also been in retrograde since March in the sign of Aries. She is asking us to take note of the calls of our hearts. How do my values align with my choices and actions? Is my worthiness validated in what is manifested around me? She is exploring the whys of what we do. Are you doing things because we need to feel better about who we are? Are we hiding our flaws with action? Are we too vested in what the other wants and not with creating boundaries around what is a call of my heart and what is a fear of my heart? Venus has since dipped back into Pisces where she will remain until 4/15. This is a deep time of heart healing. It can be a time of healing old wounds and laying them to rest, you know the ones that speak untruths like...this job, this relationship, this next thing will make me enough. Venus will square Saturn Saturday asking us whose values do we serve ours or another's? Our values drive our choices or the choices and impacts will reflect values that need to be laid to rest. 

Saturn in Sagittarius will go retrograde on Wednesday and will stay in retrograde until August.  Saturn in Sagittarius is asking us to reflect on what truths we are building our lives around and who owns them and who do they serve? Whose the authority of your life and even more your energy? Saturn often teaches through the school of hard knocks as time and experience get to be wise teachers of truths that we cannot stand on for the long haul. We cannot look outside for the leader for the decoder of our truth. We must look within. The one we have been waiting for has been inside ourselves waiting to emerge. The book we must pick up is the book of our life. Experience is best teacher of wisdom, far better than any class or degree could ever be. Sometimes growing up is hard but we can choose how hard it has to be right? 

"Dom, dom, dom!"And last but certainly not least, it is Mercury retrograde time again. Sunday Mercury stations in Taurus until may 5th. Mercury rules our communication, technology, travel... the mental functions. He will start in Taurus and then dip back into Aries. Mercury in Taurus is a bit stubborn, slower, and practical. We get an invitation to slow down and smell the roses of our creations. What your have been thinking, dreaming, and talking about has shown up. Your words are powerful. How do your creations feel? How do they echo your values and your worth? As he dips back into Aries, you get a chance to redo that honing in of desires and to start to tell a revised story. Once in which you will perhaps enjoy more in the future? Don't like what you see, feel, and experience now? Change the song playing in your background music in your head. Like what you are experiencing? Then tend to it. Take care of it. Nurture it so it can develop strong roots. With Mercury we face time. Sometimes we live like we have a lot of time and we put off what we need to tend to now, what desires do not need to be put off any longer?  Sometimes we don't take the time to pause and look around so that we can be more conscious of our creations and the "collateral beauty" that they are creating. What good is all of this creating if we cannot stop to smell the roses anyway?

I saw a powerful movie last weekend called "Collateral Beauty". This movie deals with the 3 whys that are intertwined into every decision we make. We all want love. We all fear death and we all wish we had more time. I feel these are important whys to explore presently. What are you doing to create more love in your life? How do your actions speak to how lovable you are? The root of most fears is death. What fears are taking control and bossing your around keeping you from using your time to be in love and to create the fertile soil for more love to grow? Our whys are important to understand because they tell the story of our future. We must be conscious of the script we are writing because time is never promised yet love surrounds us. 

The moon this week...Monday and Tuesday: Cancer (self care and emotional well ness check); Wednesday-Thursday: Leo (play, express yourself, fun therapy), Friday-Saturday: Virgo (body care, wellness routines); Sunday: Libra (beautify the world, listen more, relationship appreciation day)

Love to all of you!

 

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The Power of Choice
Mar
29
6:00pm 6:00pm

The Power of Choice

Aries (ruled by Mars) is here and with it comes action, beginnings, assertions, desire and some instinctual energy that needs to move! Motivation may be higher than it has been in a while and you may have those inner callings to make it happen...but if we reflect too much, suppress or hesitate the energy may come out as anger, aggression, frustration or anxiousness. This is a crucial time to get out of our head and into our bodies. We need to be physical! This energy needs to be grounded so our practices that channel that energy into the areas that best serve our values and callings is essential so that we are not leaking energy all over the place. This is where the power of choice comes in. Aries cultivates the courage to act. We must remember that our actions are powerful as our our decisions not to act. In both cases we are making a choice, the difference is where  our consciousness lies in our choice making. How can we use this lunar cycle to direct our choices towards that which feeds our deep desires?

Monday, we started a new lunar cycle with the new moon in Aries. This is a cycle to explore your individual desires. What do you want? Not what does everyone else want for you. What are those instinctual urges calling you towards? Aries is often considered the Warrior and this can lend itself to thoughts of fighting and defending your desires and strengthening your boundary when you are challenged. Often times though it is not others that we need to fear but our own choices. If we remember that Libra balances Aries, then we remember that the outer will always mirror the inner as that is best mirrored in our relationships. So those that challenge you or ruffle your feathers are here to ask you to go deeper into your own truth and ask where is more courage asked for me to assert myself to myself. What are you hiding from? Where are you off track? When we use the power of the other's reflection of our own shadow qualities or our desired qualities then we can clarify the direction for our energy to flow and we can summon it with more fierceness and vigor. I notice that when the battle lines get drawn with another, the battle for me in truly within. If I look to where I am in inner conflict then I can expose the energy leak or confused and misdirected energy.

Venus just went retrograde in the sign of Aries on March 4th. She conjuncted the sun last week to begin another 19 month cycle. Sunday she will travel back into Pisces and will station direct on April 15th. Venus represents the feminine but is currently in a masculine sign so this is a deep time of integrating the masculine and the feminine aspects of ourselves. During her cycle of retrograde we are in a time of re-evaluating our relationships. What do you want in your relationships? Who do you want in relationships? How do your choices support these desires? This is also a time to re evaluate the choices of how we invest our time, energy and attention. Our vital energy is our most precious resource, without it we don't have energy to survive much less thrive. So this is a time for looking at our choices for how we spend our TEA (time, energy and attention). Venus teaches us that what we value we draw to us. Sometimes our choices speak differently than our hearts. I find often that what my heart desires is not what my mind directs my energy towards. Sometimes our fears or our unconscious patterns are drawing to us something different that what we truly desire. This is where we have the power to choose what speaks to our desires and the choice to say no and to refrain from actions that do not honor these desires. Boundaries come back into play. When Venus dips back into Pisces boundaries becomes more allusive. What if others don't like what you value or what you desire? What if it upsets them or triggers them? How do we feel when we choose what we want and when we do not? This is a time to listen to your heart. Pisces deals a lot with endings and sometimes we must make choices to say no and end relationships (with people, things, activities) that keep us in the past or in a false representation of who we are becoming (Aries). Remember it is our choice and our choices are powerful messengers of our desires and what we can expect to come forth in the future. Pisces allows us to dream and to imagine what it would be like to start creating a reality that mirrors our desires more closely. 

Thursday retrograde Jupiter in Libra will square Pluto in Capricorn again. Jupiter in Libra is helping us expand who we are in relationships and how we expand our paradigm  by being in relationships. Jupiter's retrograde cycle is a time for reflecting about how we are being met in relationships. Where are we giving too much or not enough? Pluto in Capricorn is challenging the establishments of what the we were told is "the way and the path to success". Pluto brings with it change and transformation as what does not serve you will not stand. Capricorn is ruled by Saturn and Saturn is the heavy hand that closes the doors that dare not be worthy of your purpose for the long haul. So this square brings about a need to re negotiate whose the boss in your life? Whose truths do you embody? What is the purpose of who and what is in your life and does it give you meaning and depth that you can stand on? Will it last?

I feel this time to be simply amazing. We are realizing what powerful creators we are. We have the power to say "Yes" and to claim what is in resonant to our heart's callings. Doing this calls forth more of what we say yes to. We also have the power to say "No" and to redirect the energy coming our way. We can also be unconscious and make choices by default and claim fate as the excuse. Even in this scenario we are making a choice. Aries begets courage. It takes courage to choose consciously. This is time of looking around and reflecting on what you have chosen thus far and to feel deeply if it warrants more energy and momentum. Happy choosing...

The moon this week: Wednesday and Thursday in Taurus (feed the body, stabilize, get still inside (maybe by exercising the body); Friday and Saturday in Gemini (communicate, talk it out, learn, feed the mind material that gives your nourishment); Sunday and Monday in Cancer (self care, nurture your emotional side,  find sanctuary for your soul).

 

 

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Sun Breaks
Mar
13
9:30pm 9:30pm

Sun Breaks

This week we prepare for the Spring Equinox (next Monday) and the commencement of the beginning of the astrological new year. The full moon in Virgo last Sunday may still be helping you clean up and integrate what has been transpiring in your life to prepare for what may be ready to bloom this spring. We have been in a time of releasing, feeling, healing and it has been intense. We are doing a lot of downloading of new energy and it not be yet entering our realm of mental consciousness. Perhaps your body has been doing some talking, or you feel emotional overload that does not make any sense, or you just feel plain our of sorts. Clarity is coming and our energies are getting ready to align so that action will feel more supported and not forced. Look for the sun breaks of insight, motivation, and clarity this week as things are about to speed up!

Monday, Mercury moves into Aries. The foggy head and nebulous ride through Pisces may have been giving you information of a spiritual or mystic flavor but it may not have fed your mental mind. Now that Mercury enters Aries, we are ready to launch and put into motion our ideas. Get the ideas flowing and channel what your desires are leading you towards putting in action. Launch that website, write that letter, send in that proposal! Later in the week Mercury will conjoin (merge) with retrograde Venus. Give a voice to what is on your hearts with those you are relationship with. Give a voice to what you need in your relationships ..even the one with yourself. 

The Sun has been moving through Pisces and we have been sobering up to some illusions that have kept us feeling alone, separate, closed off to our hearts and living in a world more fantasy than real. We have been invited to remember our vastness, that we are so much more than we perceive, that the momentary troubles are not as dark as we perceive. We have been called to dream and to engage with our creativity so that we are not stifled by what is but inspired to be agents to dream it into being better. This week the Sun conjoins with Chiron (our collective wounds that keep us separate from each other and separate from source, unity, God, connection to the earth..call it what you want). Where do you need your compassion, your deep presence, your forgiveness and love? How we do all un guard ourselves to open towards each other? When our hearts are closed off, we see ourselves as separate. We feel loneliness in our pain. When we open towards our vulnerabilities and not run from them, we see each other through our shared pains. We can connect deeply and feel the unity and spaciousness around the raw reality of being human in this physical world. The ground we seek is an illusion. We are not in control. We cannot escape karma and the pain that is a part of life. But, we don't have to suffer. There is healing and there is community. Real wholeness isn't obliterating the scars like they never happened but allowing the scars to inspire us into remembering that we can transcend them. 

The Sun squares with Saturn this weekend, and truth although painful can be sun break out of the haze into our maturity so that we are ready to step into our more authentic selves. Running from the pain, we can numb ourselves out of reality and out of the work we need to do to heal. We can make ourselves smaller than we really are. We can settle for mediocre instead of remembering that we can shoot for the stars. We can forget that life and how we live it should not be devoid of heart. Saturn although stern and heavy handed (and not the life of the party by any means) is simply trying to redirect our efforts towards that which will give us more inner peace and fulfillment. We don't know what we don't know and it can take the firm guidance of Saturn to point out what is simply not going to give us the experience we came seeking. Saturn urges us to learn from our experiences and use them to gain wisdom about who we are and often who we are not. Saturn give us the grit to keep going even when we are uncertain of the outcome. We are going to need that grit this year and that dedication to that which gives us light. 

It's going to be be a wild ride this year into seeing the manifestation of what has been germinating under the surface. Let this week be one of real conversations with yourself and reality checks. Let the next steps come...Love and and blessings to you all!

 

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Seeing in the dark
Mar
6
9:00pm 9:00pm

Seeing in the dark

So much going on in the sky this week and yet it can be hard to make sense of it all. We are in a transition time of endings and new beginnings with the mutable energy of Pisces. This is an emotional,  awkward, nebulous time where the hows may allude us. It is truly a time to focus on being present and grounded then getting clear with what is important and from your heart. There is also a call for  surrendering of all that needs to be let go. Not only letting go of physical (people, situations) things but also of the having to know, the unfulfilled wishes, the forcing of our ways, and the managing of it all. We are all learning to see in the dark. Seeing in the dark requires more than just thinking, it requires us to hone in all our senses and intelligences (body, mind, spirit, and emotions) to activate this deeper wisdom to guide us. We are learning to be ourselves in ways we have not been before and thus the old ways of navigating and reasoning may not serve us. If we can let go of the details and focus more on clear, intentional steps that feel aligned then we open ourselves to profound experiences with the mystery and magic of spirit. 

I want to break down some key events that are all transpiring right now. Venus  just went retrograde at 13 degrees Aries. Her retrograde cycle is for 40 days. Venus is the planet that rules relationships (inner ones with ourselves and ones with others). Venus also deals with financial matters. On a deeper level, Venus is the feminine. Not being a female but the feminine creative and receptive nature that exists in all beings. During a retrograde cycle, the focus is inward and reflective. There is a need to revisit themes again that need to be integrated in a deeper way. Perhaps past relationships or relationship themes are needed to be understood in a new light. Perhaps financial matters are up for a different take. On a more collective level, we are also receiving downloads of new ways of expressing our feminine nature. We are learning how to be in our hearts and how to take bold steps from this  space.. We are deepening our capacity to love ourselves and each other. This is a time to reflect on what you value and who you value most. How are you allowing yourself to be open to receive more of what you love in? How are you showing up more authentically from your heart? This is a time for deep healing work. This time calls for the courage found in the Aries archetype. This is a time to listen to the wisdom that is ready to direct you in new ways. To do this work, we must get to know our hearts and to tend to issues near and dear to our hearts. Often we must explore the cracks to find where the light comes in.  This is a potent time of heart activation before the Spring Equinox. Once we know what is dear to us, we can honor it fully with our intentional actions that lead to a more balanced way of being in this world. 

Mercury is moving through Pisces with the Sun and Monday conjoins the Sun. While Mercury is in Pisces this is not the time for big decisions and vivid clarity. This is a very spiritual auspicious time to sharpen your intuitive skills though. It is a time to feel deeply, to sit back and observe, to be in nature and to let go of obsessive habitual thinking. I am practicing the "I don't know meditation." Try to observe, be open, and refrain from having to know, figure out, fix or categorize what is transpiring. Allow space around it all so that you can tap into the intelligence that directs the universe. Slow down, don't believe everything you think or that you are told. Let things come to you. Not all the information is present. We don't have the details and getting them may prove difficult for now. Tend to the practical matters of life and for the areas of conflict, give yourself a break and shift your approach to allow for more spaciousness. This is where the magic can come in. Meditation can be an ally during these times. 

Mars moves into Taurus on Thursday, this may calm the storms a bit. If you have been feeling overly frustrated, angry, short tempered and a little out of control with impulse regulation then this fixed earth energy of Taurus may level you out. Tend to your body. Take your time before acting. Slow down and experience what you are creating. Be intentional with your energy and take some rest. You will to be rested and gas tank full as the year is truly only about to begin. We are laying the groundwork now. Like we hear when traveling "secure your air mask before you secure another's". Taurus teaches us to take care of ourselves and develop more self-sufficiency. This helps us in loose boundary times of Pisces. 

Sunday, the moon is full in the sign of 22 degrees Virgo. This full moon is opposite the Sun conjoined with Chiron and Mercury and square to Saturn in Sagittarius. This moon may highlight the feelings that are trapped, the clingings to the past, our delusions of how it really is (or how we need it to be), and our suffering that we shy away from. Pisces truly teaches us about inclusion and the power that love has to not deem anything as excluded from source and love. The divine is present in all around us and all that shows up within us. It is  all worthy of love and acceptance. This does not mean that we are doormats or that we give up as we face the wounds of our battles. We are learning that through compassionate love for ourselves and others we unite ourselves and each other in healing and we transcend the temporary and the small way of perceiving experience to understand that it is all larger than we can ever understand. Then we touch the universal intelligence.  Virgo balances Pisces. Where in Pisces is all so mystical and cloudy and at times difficult to touch with our understandings, like trying to hold an ocean in your hand. Virgo allows us the earthly qualities that we can touch. We get the dose of reality when we know thyself fully and not with the rose colored glasses on. Whiles Pisces defines love as inclusion,  Virgo defines love with its ability to refine, correct and improve things. Virgo is the servant and urges us to offer ourselves fully to our integration, healing and alignment. We must understand what is and be dedicated to moving towards that which continues to teach us to be available to show up in our full light  It also desires that we are seen in our true selves and received for who we are. When we love ourselves and accept ourselves for who we are, then we open the heart. When we open our heart, we can give more fully from the abundance of compassion that resides there. Love heals. Virgo is deemed the healer. When we can love, we have the power to heal. When we heal we have the tools and the experience to share and support others in their healing. Saturn in Sagittarius teaches that our experiences is the guru to finding our truth. Saturn teaches us about hard work, endurance, and that nothing meaningful in life is easy or quick. This full moon, we realize that healing is a lifetime process of day to day, step by step unveiling of our truth and light.  It takes work to heal. It takes self-knowledge and the desire to not settle for status quo, not because we are imperfect in how we are but because divine intelligence is always expanding and we too are always evolving. Healing also takes compassion, surrender, and love. When we combine the two we initiate ourselves into the fullness of our "beingness". 

So, let's all learn to see with more than our eyes, let us have the courage to open the heart to see with all of the wisdom embodied within. Let the dark be a place for welcoming us to a deeper way of experiencing ourselves and the reality of life. 

 

 

 

 

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Flood Gates
Feb
20
8:00am 8:00am

Flood Gates

We can thank nature in Portland for giving us a very good analogy of what this upcoming week may have in store for us emotionally; flooding rains. Get ready to feel, a lot. Get ready to feel not just your stuff but collective stuff we are all processing. The Sun, the moon, Neptune, the South Node and Mercury all join up Friday for a new moon/Annular Solar Eclipse in 8 degrees Pisces. The bright spot in all this emotional flooding; healing. When we feel, when we put down our guards around our hearts, when we open our eyes and lean into the pain of our battle wounds, we can heal them. We may feel like drowning but the T square of Jupiter (Libra) opposite Uranus (Aries) conjunct Mars now and square Pluto (Capricorn) give us the get up and go so we  won't stay down for long! Mars in Aries adds more fire to Uranus's shake up of all that needs to be dismantled. Some of us feel this as aggression, frustration and short fuses while some may feel liberation. Something new (although not yet visible and barely perceivable) is being born. If we can wade through these waters a bit longer, we may find a new land.

The Sun recently moved into Pisces and as you just heard as of Friday we will have most of the solar system in this archetype! Pisces is ruled by Neptune and traditionally ruled by Jupiter. Pisces is generally considered mutable water but you can even consider it ether. Mutable signs "mutate" energy through transformation, healing. Energy in its current form needs to be adapted to be better aligned with what is necessary now and in the future. Pisces is a very intuitive and creative sign. It connects us to the collective unconscious and with that comes our collective wounds, ideas, needs, inspirations, etc. It also connects us with unlimited potential. We are in the realm of spirit and the mystery. Normal laws of time and space do not apply with Pisces. This is miracle territory (ESP, telepathy zones). With Pisces the veil is very thin and what separates us normally dissolves. We feel our own stuff and we feel each others, and thus there is the potential for deep connection that is not personally driven. Pisces is the higher octave of love, universal love not conditional love. As with all archetypes we see a shadow side. With Pisces it is escapism, addition, delusion and martyrdom. We can feel so much, we can sense so deeply that we cannot process it. We can avoid it by finding escapes through drugs, mind numbing tactics or, making up stories about it grounded in fantasy. We can also sense all of it and decide it is on us to heal it all (another form of escapism) and we can play the martyr, ignoring the other's part in their own healing. I may decide that I would rather deal with your issues than my own. That would be so "spiritual" of me!  Pisces is the most mystical and spiritually focused sign but often our understanding of what that means can be tainted by religion and thoughts that spirit is outside of our realm. Traditionally, those that were most spiritual were in monasteries or up on the top of the mountain separated from the normal folk. So, in Pisces we can feel this deep loneliness when we perceive spirit to be somewhere else other than inside and a part of us. Pisces is the raw, unkept, deep honest place that true reality exists within. Egos dissolve and we are left with the wisdom that we are spiritual beings having a physical experience for a blip of time. 

So how does all that apply to this week? Let's start with the T square that has been going on for some time now with Uranus, Pluto and Jupiter. These cardinal (initiating) signs are creating something new. We are being asked to get in touch with our deep personal desires. We are are being asked to transform outdated, suppressive traditions of society into more balanced, harmonious and less polarized beliefs and expanded living. More personally, where have you been absent of heart and spirit in living "the grind"? What feeds your spirit and opens your perspective to a more broad and inclusive reality where being in your heart and being fed is part of the solution of bringing us together? This new reality cannot be born until we can feel the affects and sober to the fact that is is not working out presently. We cannot heal until we realize we have a wound. It is the old "what we resist persists" truth. We cannot unite in love until we realize we all are in pain together. Again more personally, until we can face our pain, we cannot feel the support around us in exposing the wound to the light to heal. The Sun conjunct the S Node (our past, karma, the habitual patterns) is square Black Moon Lilith in Sagittarius (our raw truth that gets suppressed and shamed). This is where we may meet the judgement of ourselves. We may feel that our pain and wounds make us less than. Conversely, we may let our wounds create a false judgement of what is possible and what is not. Our growth comes in welcoming our wounds as wisdom teachers and valid guests as the table that do not have to be there forever but yet leave marks of wisdom that can be carried onward into our healing. Then our wounds can give us judgement and discernment over what needs not repeating rather than using them as a place of judgement for ourselves and others. What we cannot face in our shadow we will project onto others. Chiron (wounded healer) in Pisces is square Saturn in Sagittarius, encouraging us that our truth is not only found in what we know and what we are good at doing, but also in the wisdom of our tender places of vulnerability. When we are vulnerable enough to see ourselves in our pain then we cultivate a wisdom that supercedes false ideals of who we should be and how we should be. We can just be ourselves, and know what wholeness is not absent of shadow, it is simply just not ruled by what we are not willing to see. 

Friday, we experience the solar eclipse on the new moon. Two weeks ago, on the lunar eclipse we were asked to get in touch with our hearts and to ask what can we offer in our creative acts of the heart to humanity. Now, the question is what are you willing to do on your part of the evolutionary healing that we all so desperately need? We are birthing a new culture, one that respects our "humaness", spirit,  the laws of nature, and love. A world of hate and separation will not last. A life that asks you to pretend to be who you are and motivates you to want to escape reality isn't worthy of our spirit. We are infinite spiritual beings with infinite possibilities. We are encouraged to start living this truth. There is support for this paradigm in unseen forces and means. Love is the most powerful "weapon" we could ever use and yet it is the one most ignored when seeking solutions. It starts with recognizing the familiar face in front of you. Our pain is mirrored in each other. We all feel pain, loss, loneliness, confusion...none of us know what is happening and where these waters of change are leading us. Yet, we can trust that if love is leading, we are held. If we can find the courage to heal inside what keeps us separate from our own love then we can apply that same compassionate love to others. When we heal ourselves, we heal our world. There is no separation between us anyway. If I heal then you heal too because we are connected. I don't have to manage how that looks and you don't need me to heal you. We all have our own part in this mysterious process. We don't need to understand it, healing isn't linear or logical. So on this new moon/eclipse, where is you love needed? Where can compassion, love, and surrender serve you and humanity when we pause to feel and to open? Where can you receive in and allow the mystery of spirit to heal you? This can be a time of emotional drowning and wallowing or it can be a time of deep honest reflection and un-guarding. It can be auspicious and beautiful. When the floodgates of love open, no one ever drowns. (Susan Gale). 

 

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Show time!
Feb
6
6:00pm 6:00pm

Show time!

Eclipse time is here again! This Friday during our full moon in Leo we will see a partial lunar eclipse. Eclipses are times of rapid shifts, insights, and change. This can be a powerful time to be receiving the support we need to make potent shifts in our lives. In two weeks on the new moon in Pisces we will experience a solar eclipse. So in this portal of time between eclipses, sense how nature is supporting the necessary changes and insights you need to speed up your growth and healing. Tuesday Mercury joins the Sun in Aquarius, more power to thinking outside the box and embracing the unusual and unexpected.  Jupiter the planet that rules our growth and expansion has headed into its retrograde period allowing us time to reflect on our path's direction. Where are we headed? Where do we want to go? How are we being met? What is the deeper truths we are learning about ourselves through the mirror of our relationships? We feel life's uncertainty together. We are all scratching our heads and asking when does it all stop and go back to normal? This week we get to mingle with the concept that perhaps normal is being redefined and we are in the midst of defining our role within it. 

Let's break it all down. First of all note that there is a lot of fire and air energy around us. These energies are very yang, they move fast and they are intense. It is easy to get burned out, lit up and blown away with thoughts and incessant doing, distracting and running around as if the sky was falling. We need to balance this with earth and water. We need to be in our bodies, do your physical exercise, your meditation, have some good self care routines that you adhere to. Take time outs to be alone and to connect to your feelings and to listen to your inner voice and guidance. This will feel against the grain a bit with all this fire and air but this is where knowing yourself and your tendencies help you monitor what you need and where you are getting caught up in the frenzy and disconnected from your center. I find simply stopping to breathe deeply and feel my body helps immensely in staying present and not panicking with all the chaos and momentum around us. 

Mercury enters Aquarius Tuesday. Mercury rules communication, transportation and technology. When in Aquarius we are challenged to look outside the lines we have defined, where we feel the ceiling lies and also where we may be so certain we are right or even lost that we fail to open to new and innovative ways to see old problems and situations. We are invited to change things up and be differently. I read recently that 80% of the thoughts running through our minds have been thought before, they are old and most likely strictly habitual and perhaps not even true. Aquarius dares us to speak out, to be different, to rebel against the norm. Look for where you are afraid to communicate a part of your truth that feels odd or freaky. What can you reframe to see a situation with fresh eyes? How you embrace uncertainty? How do we trust that often change is needed to see what we have been missing by viewing it the same way? So, permission to step outside comfort zones..maybe your odd and peculiar is just what is needed to jointly come to a consensus that results in a solution previously unavailable. Unity in diversity!

Jupiter in starts his retrograde period from now until June. Jupiter in Libra is opposite Uranus in Aries. This opposition has been stirring up our desires and where we need to break free and let our spirit out. It has also been asking us to find new perspectives that are less polarized. We are working on ourselves though our relationships. Libra is where we learn partnerships, who to trust, how to listen, how to give and how to receive. How do we navigate who we are as individuals with who we are in partnerships? What does each teach us about being connected to our spirits while being in a world that needs us to learn to share, to love more and to respect the other despite diversities of all kinds. Jupiter also teaches us about how we expand and grow. Jupiter is our path finder. Jupiter helps us simplify and distill down our desires to that which really deepens our experience of our truth. Relationships are a speedy way to expand us. This is a potent time to reflect on our relationship learnings and how this is developing our sense of self and our path. 

Friday, at 4:33pm the moon is full in the sign of 22 degrees Libra. The lunar eclipse occurs at 4:45pm. Leo balances Aquarius and Aquarius balances Leo. Leo adds the element of heart. Leo connects us to our self expression and our creativity that we want to be seen by others. Leo connects us to passion and play. Leo lets us be a little selfish and how to steal the stage to get some attention. Leo lets us get lost in the fun of it. This is a more "me, myself and I" focus than the Aquarian archetype which can certainly get some attention but a different kind of attention, the kind we generally don't want. Attention for being out of the ordinary and not like you "should" be. Aquarius is very Truth focused and detached from emotions, personal interests that give temporary pleasure. It is the archetype that starts revolution. This lunar eclipse speaks to the importance of both archetypes in creating sustainable change that supports our personal and collective evolution. "Individual realizations acquire their true meaning only as they fulfill a collective purpose." When we tap into our creative potential, that part of us that allows our sprit to express its unique gifts and personalities and we offer that in service to our community then bigger things happen. When we let our heart lead and we apply those passions towards a higher goal then love is magnified. What we pour our heart and soul into is medicine for our own souls and when we are full then there is more to give. " The release of higher energies becomes effective and value to the extent to which it serves a higher but concrete and definite purpose."  This full moon asks you, what do you have to share from your heart? What is pulsating inside you ready to be poured into a mold to be offered to the world to serve a purpose that is greater than just serving our immediate needs? I have found that when I truly connect to what I love and what lights me up and I follow its pure expression, what results wants to be shared and given away. I receive more in giving it away then keeping it hidden. The full moon makes a trine with Saturn in Sagittarius (asking us to step up to our truth) and Uranus in Aries (unleashing our desires). So its show time, you are called up to the stage, what is your next scene presenting to the eager audience? The world needs your gifts. The world needs you and not the you others want or define, the you that you came here to be. A good actor channels his or her life experience, those raw emotions, the spirit within, to present his or her perspective on a script. Sometimes it falls off the written lines and perhaps when that happens the script goes a direction that is elevated from its previous state. The stars would lean in that direction. The light is on you...

 

 

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Doing it Differently
Jan
31
8:00pm 8:00pm

Doing it Differently

It is an odd time to say the least! So much change, craziness and unpredictability makes us all want to go on vacation or hide under the covers. Get ready for some fire under your feet this week though! Mars (action, our will) has entered Aries and Friday Venus (our body, our values, relationships) will follow and in the final days before we watch Jupiter go retrograde, we get the chance to take action and feel motivated to place some energy into what we feel needs to be born. Feel the support to take some unexpected leaps while all the planets are direct for the next 4 days. Whatever you do it won't be the same as we are in the time of reformation!

The Sun is in Aquarius and this lunar cycle is all about innovation...Doing it differently, rebelling from the norm, embracing odd and unique, and breathing a little unpredictability and uncertainty into the mix. All this can sound exciting but the reality of living it can be scary and chaotic because it means we have to deal with change. The truth is that we mostly resist change. We like to predict how it will go down. We enjoy feeling in control and in the know. We don't do it differently because we like the comfort of how the routine or expected feels. This is far from the energy that has come to play. Uranus (ruler of Aquarius) is in the sign of Aries. Aries is all about doing. It is the ready, fire , aim energy that has no patience and not a lot of consciousness...it just wants to be let loose and to get it done. Aries is that firecracker within you ready to make some noise sponsored by those uninhibited desires. The desires that you don't check in with consensus about. So, we are invited to take action and to push play on those deep internal desires right now and we cannot pull a play from last year's play book to make it work. It has to be outside the box. When we do things differently we get different results. Chaos can bring about creative solutions to routine dilemmas. When new energy circulates we feel fresh and invigorated. 

But, there is one caveat to this innovation and new movement. Jupiter is Libra is opposite Uranus. Libra is ruled by Venus (the body, beauty, love, relationship, receptivity). Libra is about balance, partnership and perspective. Jupiter will go retrograde Sunday allowing us to reflect on how we are creating balance, equitable partnerships and gaining a fresh perspective as we expand and evolve. This element offers us the opposite side of all this innovative doing...we are not in a vacuum so staying open, staying present and observing and listening to the other cannot be remiss in these times. We cannot put our blinders on and go about our agendas ignoring consequences to others in our relationships and even in our environment. So we have to strike a balance, we need to check in and feel those desires that need some space to come out and be born, we need to accept that change is needed and reform is not an option but as we get the gusto to step into this we will need each other's mirror and the perspective of being open minded to make these changes stick and actually enhance our life and our world. 

Mercury conjoins Pluto in Capricorn this week and squares this Uranus opposite Jupiter. We are getting encouragement to transform our thoughts and to put some effort into how our thinking, planning, and decision making is supporting this innovative transformation. Capricorn energy thrives with routine and structure. We are seeing that our comfortable structures are being changed, shaken up and revamped. Pluto doesn't tread lightly so these changes to our habitual comforts and cozy structures of predictability will not be easy to swallow. We cannot think the same way and change. We cannot plan to do the same things the same way and change. Part of being open to innovation through transformation is embracing with an open heart the ways in which we cannot control the hows and we will not know the outcomes. These times are scary, we may feel we have lost our solid ground. Aquarius is an air sign and there is very little earth element found within the planets. I feel this is requiring us to ground and seek refuge within new structures of support. To find strength and certainty within our faith that Mama Earth and the forces of nature have always been in control. Like the mother natures shows, life is always in cycles and although change is certain, we can rest that it won't be any which way forever. The pendulum always swings both directions. If something is dying then something is being born. And sooner or later that too will die and and thus the cycles continue. 

So this time is saying "Do it differently" but staying open minded. Stay connected to yourself and especially to those around you. We need each other. We need to love each other more than we need to find faults and to point fingers. The Truth doesn't need our approval to emerge but we can certainly be open, free vessels for it to pour through.  Be the change that you want to see in the world.. is how it goes right? Let's see how we can soften towards that which makes us uncomfortable, even if they are people or values that we do not understand. Let's plan for uncertainty and let's embrace what makes us our own rebel for a cause that gives us a voice to be heard. You deserve to be heard, but so does everyone else. 

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 Habits
Jan
26
10:30am10:30am

Habits

Feeling tired? Hard to motivate? Feeling like it is a start go kind of start to your year and your intentions? Been sick? Want to get away from it all due to all the emotional overwhelm? Venus, Mars, the South Node, Neptune and Chiron in Pisces is certainly bringing some of this to the surface. Despite being at the start of the new year, we are dealing with perhaps a lot of endings, confusion and uncertainty about how it all is shaping up. We may have the urge to try new things and to start in new directions yet see how our habits and tendencies sway us back to what we know and what we have done. Nothing is easier to start then a bad habit and similarly nothing is harder to lose. The Sun just moved into Aquarius and we may be feeling like shaking it up or perhaps life is shaking up for you without permission. We are collectively trying to learn new ways of being, thinking, relating and creating yet new habits are a bit difficult to start because they feel awkward and unfamiliar. No one is really in that camp yet we have a village in the old camp. The new moon in Aquarius on Friday is helping us conceptualize the habits that perhaps will support the new forms that our lives and world need to move forward into freedom from what has held us back, from a truth that is broader more inclusive and more up to the challenges of the day. 

We have been dealing a lot with time with Saturn in Sagittarius in square (tension) to Venus (our bodies and our relationships), Mars (our will and actions) and Chiron (the wound of separation, feeling alone or separated from love, the divine, connection). Sometimes time is teaching by experience and the effects of the choices we make that only become apparent over time. We are also learning about the right timing, when to start, when to let go, when to be patient, when to ask for help, etc (Jupiter in Libra). More than anything I feel we are learning that time is not linear as we often perceive it to be. We think because we become clear about an intention and we set something in motion that time will carry it along and we will move forward into time with this new intention growing and maturing and eventually giving birth to what we think it will yeild emotionally, materially, energetically.  Unfortunately, time is not really linear and especially now with the emphasis on Pisces we can be in a time of both new beginnings (recent cardinal T square with Jupiter, Uranus, Pluto) and dissolution and endings all at the same time. Sometimes when something becomes clear and we make a big evolutionary leap with our intentions and understandings what has to happen next falls out of our plans. Sometimes things of our life need to be re-arranged, dismantled and often put to rest. This is the realm of Pisces, the cloud, infinite potential, the workings of the divine and the mystery. When this happens it is easy to feel confused, disheartened, disconnected and to feel we did something wrong. Perhaps, this is the time to learn how to feel these emotions (Pisces is a place of feeling) yet not be tempted to check out, give up or  be overwhelmed by it all. It is a time to trust in the mysterious forces and to surrender to the process of change and transformation that we cannot possibly fully understand and predict. When we acknowledge that we feel alone, separate, confused but then stay the course of active participation in our life, then we harness a faith in spirit, ourselves and the power of our truth and intentions. Saturn in Sag has been nudging us towards our truth. We are making choices and we have been paving the way for it but at some point we must pause and wait and let the dots connect and let the fog clear before we keep forging ahead. Otherwise, our habits rule. Habits that perhaps no longer serve us. Habits like when we feel things going a direction that we did not foresee, we force our way, we speed up, we get desperate. Habits like when we get overwhelmed we shut down and give up. We feel sorry for ourselves and we watch another episode of tv or we pour another glass of wine. What will it matter anyway? When we do this (and we all do so no judgment here) we let the past habits rule. The South Node is in Pisces and so when we disconnect and when we cut off from the natural flow, we are going to repeat the habits we have karmically been feeding. Time is not on our side with this as old habits die hard. Pisces is balanced by Virgo. Virgo is about the habits, routines and self-knowledge that we learn about ourselves that leads to improvement and purity of intention. We must be conscious enough to know when we are feeding a "bad/old" habit and opportunity is presenting a new way to relate to the circumstances of our life. A new habit like connecting more to nature or spirit when we feel lost instead of numbing out. A new habit like feeding our other creative outlets when we feel like our intentions are not manifesting as quickly or in the way we feel it should go.  The beauty of surrendering into the moment and responding to it with more truth in who we are now (and desire to be) and not who we were is that we can connect to the timeless parts of ourselves. The wise parts of ourselves that know that there is always perfect timing at hand. The divine makes no mistakes. We cannot create what we are not fully embodied in. We cannot surrender what we have not finished learning from. So, perfect timing is best to be allotted to the divine forces of nature that knows when best to support the natural evolution of our growth the cycles of time. 

The Sun in Aquarius is helping us with new habits, new perceptions and ideas and inspiration of a truth unattached to emotion and the patterns of the past or the collective. We are inspired by others. We like role models. We are herd creatures. Often it is lonely and not really so desirable to be the lone wolf in the crowd. Some of us don't want to be first or the odd one out. Yet, someone has to break the mold to show us that the mold needed to be morphed. Aquarius is fixed energy so that means it takes the energy that has been initiated and it distributes it and concentrates it so that it can get out to the masses so that it can be sustainable. Some things in our lives and our world are not sustainable. Somethings in our life and world are not able to feed the masses or even all of our growing and evolving selves.  Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result right? The mad scientists are often the ones that seem crazy but they are also on to something..perhaps unpopular but often what is needed for necessary reform. Quirky is often a blessing. Unique is not a curse. We need ideas and plans and even habits that work for all of ourselves and diversity of life we face. We often times need to step outside the box to see what was holding us back and what is plugging the drain. Aquarius is the air that breathes in that insight for innovation. On this new moon, be open to what ideas and concepts need reform and what, where and how can you innovate areas of your life that need to be more sustainable and equitable. Where do you need to break out and be a little odd and unique? How can where you feel overwhelmed and overtaken be a pathway to where you might be setting the stage for new habits that are worth repeating time and time again.

Blessings to you all friends! 

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Walking in another's shoes
Jan
18
1:30pm 1:30pm

Walking in another's shoes

We are in the final days of Capricorn as Thursday the Sun enters Aquarius. Ha, right before the inauguration we welcome the sign of all things uncanny, rebellious, unstable and completely out of the ordinary. Aquarius is fixed air so we are coming from cardinal earth and things of a physical nature to things of the mind and our intellect. Innovation and shaking things up will be a theme that we can play with during this lunar cycle. A gift of Aquarius is freedom from the norm and unity in diversity. There is something brilliant and genius that can emerge when we step out of what we know all too well. I think the planets set up this week quite nicely with Saturn in Sagittarius square Mars conjunct Chiron and Venus in Pisces. I am going to summarize this as an invitation to soften your hard edges of what you know to be the way, the truth and "right". We have a right to our truth. We have an obligation to know it and to live it perhaps but what about when it starts to make us hard and rigid and it closes down our hearts and our ability to show empathy? What about when it disconnects us from others and our environment? How do we strike that balance? That is the dance this week friends!

There is a lot of Pisces influence right now. Pisces is mutable water. It connects us to feeling, the ocean of universal love and connection. It dissolves barriers and tears down the walls of separation between you and me and us and spirit. It is where unlimited potential, creativity flow from. It can also be where we find ungrounded optimism and illusion/delusion and an ability to numb or check out of reality. One aspect of interest perhaps this week is empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. It is seeing pain in another and although you perhaps cannot relate you have felt that same ache in your heart too perhaps with a different scenario and thus you get it. When we share empathy with another we open our hearts. Empathy can be overdone and we can overindulge in another's feelings and emotions and take it on as a burden for us to carry or a problem for us to solve. That is a shadow side of Pisces in being the martyr, I will suffer for you since you cannot help yourself (or really I cannot help myself so I will dissolve into your world to escape). That is one side to watch for in finding our truth.

Another side, is the lack of empathy at all. It is what happens when Saturn In Sagittarius turns rigid and dogmatic and attempts to convert and condemn when something outside our experience and knowledge base is found. It is when we are so sure we are right or in the know and someone challenges this or expressed an idea, plan or feeling that challenges ours. It is when we witness the same emotion or passionate righteousness but perhaps to a polar situation and instead of placing ourselves in another's shoes, we work to make ourselves more right and thus them more wrong. This too can be a side to watch for in discovering our truth. The Chiron influence might suggest a little projection of our own wounds and fears onto another when this happens. For example, if I have found a truth that makes me more powerful than another or more right then I will perhaps be brought to interact with someone that allows me to face my fear of losing power or being uncertain about myself. I may see it as their weakness but in my challenge or judgement of them I am truly meeting my own weakness and judgement. The outer is a reflection of the inner truth applies. 

What I feel is being offered here friends is the chance to apply empathy in all situations in which ruffle your feathers and even the ones in which you are so certain you are right that you are let's say a little cocky. What if we pause in those moments and place ourselves in another's shoes (as small or large as they feel on our feet and as uncomfortable as that makes us) and allow for ourselves to feel into what comes up for us? Turn in and lean into whatever emotions arise as teachers for our growth. If I meet fear, lean in and explore what that fear may be about. If I meet, anger what is anger allowing me to learn? Not in the way of blaming another for the emotions stirred but acknowledging that it was already inside us (Chiron again) and it is ready to be felt and healed. We heal by feeling. Individually and collectively. We are at a time where we can feel a little polarized as a nation, as females and males and individuals and families, etc. If we want to heal the pain and the hate that is causing the divide, we must have the courage then for each of us to soften our hard lines and be open to what we learn when we do. I am not saying cave in, change your position, or give up, I am saying be open to what truths or Truth can pour through that expand and grow us all collectively when we practice empathy.  

 

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Roller Coaster Rides with our Emotions
Jan
10
7:00pm 7:00pm

Roller Coaster Rides with our Emotions

Just as Mercury goes direct, we welcome a full moon and a cardinal cross of intense energies. In essence, January has started and will continue keeping us very aware that there are big changes happening and on the horizon. Those of you Aries, Libra, Cancer and Capricorn..this is a big time for you!  Sagittarius, Pisces, Gemini and Virgo, there is plenty for you too! Although we are now in a new year and many of us (me included) want to pack 2016 in a box to never be opened again, in astrological terms, we build upon larger cycles of time and hence the work and the experiences of 2016 are quite valid and necessary for what we are going to meet in 2017. Bottom line, we don't get to pack away what surfaced like our Christmas decor because it is time to deal with what is in a real way so that we are ready for what is ready to emerge in 2017 differently and from a new place on knowing. 

Early Sunday morning, Mercury went direct. Although we still have some time before he arrives out of the shadow zone of the retrograde territory, you may feel some relief in the communication backlog. Be mindful of what seemed to seek another pass in the realm of communication, learning, transportation and especially with regards to where you put in the hard work and endurance in hopes of achievement of something, a goal or a destination. Right now all the planets are direct and it has been a while since we experienced this. If only we don't speed up too fast and forget that retrograde periods invite us into a pause for reflection and deeper integration. May we have the patience to discern what we needed to revisit so that in our next steps we can make the course adjustments that will allow us to feel more aligned and in our hearts. Capricorn tends to pull us away from our passions and our hearts as we can be swayed by the "shoulds" and what "they" told us we need to work for and towards. We may have devoted a lot of time and energy into something just to realize it feels a bit empty of heart and spirit. This is essential to discover so we don'r continue feeding energy into something that isn't really what we want in the long term. Even if we have put years into building it. We learn skills and methods from our experiences and when Saturn is involved we learn best by learning what does not work first. Stubbornness is a Capricorn trait so often we hold our ground until the ground swept away because we fail to see the signs. 

This week, we have what is termed a "Cardinal Cross" of aspects between Uranus, Jupiter, the Sun (loosely conjoined to Pluto) and the Moon. Cardinal energies are powerful driving forces for change with the initiation of new things. These archetypes deal with home, work, self and our relationships so when these energies meet up for dinner you can expect to feel their presence and potency.  We were just talking about Capricorn and the Sun is in a loose conjunction with Pluto in this sign. We are shining the light on our beliefs, traditions and where change is being called for in our life in order to mature into a deeper place of authentic being and doing in society and in our work (the public realm). What is holding you back? What keeps you in old habitual ways of working towards the goals instead of ideals that excite you? Sometimes we hold onto the familiar and the old because it yields comfort. Jobs and roles give us security. People that approve of our jobs and our methods of living give us security and validation. This can feel good on the outside, but this Cancer full moon will ask, how does it feel in the inside?  The full moon is Cancer is opposite the Sun and Pluto in Capricorn. 

The full moon occurs early Thursday morning in 22 degrees Cancer. Cancer is ruled by the moon so she is in her home sign and feelings are on the frontline. Feelings are unpredictable, all over the board and often unconscious. Where do they come from and why are they here? We may not always know but they give us information and are a very important part of our identity and expression. Capricorn can shut down feelings as they can "get in the way" of what is important: accomplishing the goal, doing the work, and staying strong. If we shut our feelings down, we can block our healing. We can be removed from the affect our actions have on our more tender parts. Cancer seeks emotional security. Cancer seeks to comfort and calm the inner body and to feel powerful in a more softer way, the way of the feminine. Emotions hold great power. When we are fearful of expressing them, we are removed from a very powerful aspect of our being. The part that allows us to connect deeply to our spirit and the parts of us that care not so much about feeling good about what we are accomplishing but rather how we feel about who we are within those roles and methods. The moon also deals with intuition and the ways in which we are led and guided by our inner knowing. This is so helpful for discerning when we are taking steps that are truly authentic and feeding a deeper part of ourselves or when we are fixating on a goal or mission that will feel empty at the end. This full moon forms a trine with Chiron and Mars in Pisces and Lilith in Scorpio. Bottom, line feelings are going to be hard to temper this week and this is a good thing. If we truly are ready to make changes in our life that lead to our evolution and our growth we must take inventory in how we feel. We need to meet the feelings that perhaps lock us into fears of change and transition. We need to be real with what is a fantasy and what is present. We need to acknowledge where we need to find emotional calm and balance within ourselves so that we are not seeking a role or job and others approval to do this for us. Inner security does not come from another but from tending to our feelings and gaining trust that we can take care of our inner selves as well as the parts of ourselves that want to do and accomplish. Both are needed and in this full moon, we have to go into the deep inner parts of our being to also seek what this period is illuminating. Are we chasing ghosts with our eyes closed hoping to catch what we want or are we connected to our deep intuition and allowing ourselves to be guided as we step by step do the work of showing up and making choices that feed all of us (inner and outer, masculine and feminine parts, being/doing). 

The last part of the cross deals with Jupiter in Libra opposite, Uranus in Aries. This is a time of learning to balance the masculine and the feminine. Learning how to do and how to receive. Learning how to work with others without losing ourselves and our desires rather than feeling like we have to do it all alone. This is a delicate balance. We want what we want and often we don't even know what we want because our Aries impulses just keep us acting without discernment as to were we are heading. So often we act without pausing to take the time to direct our action in more mature and resourceful ways. We are feeding a lower desire perhaps instead of a deeper desire. For example, we stay in a job that gives us money instead of seeking a job that gives us fulfillment and value.  Uranus is Aries is shaking things up a bit so that is more apparent. Uranus likes disruption and chaos. His invitation is to do things differently and when we do this we get a new perspective and often we free ourselves from chains of habit we didn't know we were prisoners to. We get to connect to our fire that confirms that we are alive. We feel passions and this brings our will to act and to put in motion what we need to go towards what we want. This is a time to connect to what do you really want? Uranus would say do something different to get closer to it. Jupiter is on the other side, letting you know that partnership and balance is also key. How does what we want affect others? We need others to manifest and to be in the world. Are you willing to do the work together? Can you see that the other is a wonderful window from which to view to world for a larger perspective. The other helps us remember that bridges connect and barriers separate. This is a time for bridges and connection. We need each other but we don't have to lose who we are in the process. We can be creative in learning new ways to unite and to work together to expand in ways that serve us all. 

In summary of this big week: we are going to feel like it is a bit like being in an amusement park. You hurry up to wait and emotions are rampant. You get on a ride and you feel amazing as it is fun fun and delightful and then it ends and you are disappointed and you wish it didn't have to end. Or maybe the ride made you sick and you thought it would never end and there is great relief when you get off. Then you must decide which ride next, so many choices, the person you are with has their opinions and you have read all the reviews about the rides, how do you make your choice that honors your wishes and yet is open to others? Then you decide and you get in line and wait again. What if this ride was the wrong choice and it stinks? You won't know until you ride it. What if this ride is even better than the last? What if this is the ride you have been waiting for? Life is a bit like this now. We truly don't know. But we do have our experiences, our emotions, the other people in our lives and our spirits/passions to guide us. They all have a voice and yet when we allow them to convene we get to make the choice. May we make choices that tend to our inner selves and our "beingness" and allow ourselves to feel the choices of our lives, may we make choices that respect each other, may we let go of what perhaps was good experiences but not good methods for allowing us to expand into intimately knowing what feeds our spirit and have the courage to do that more often than not! Big work friends, glad we have each other. Let's take this ride together!

 

 

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Sweet Darkness
Dec
18
6:30pm 6:30pm

Sweet Darkness

The week before Christmas is not only filled with the normal holiday hustle and bustle but we have Mercury retrograde, Mars moving into Pisces, the Sun entering Capricorn and Winter Solstice to tend with too! We are in a yin time with mainly water and earth elements present, so life may feel more internal, dark, deep, and reflective. The fire that we have present is a bit dampened with the strong Saturn energy which can be felt as restraint and stern. Yin energy teach us how to receive, release, draw in and restore ourselves. I can vouch that I need some of that after all that has been going on externally in our world and internally within myself. As fast as time and life seems to be moving, we are being called to slow down, reflect, and stay grounded. This is a practice and an important step in integration and initiation into the next phase. Mercury retrograde calls this in through our communication and travel. Mars in Pisces calls us to feel and connect spiritually with what we are doing. Winter Solstice honors the dark. The Sun moving into Capricorn calls us to deal with life in the realm of time and space, karma, and the land of responsibilities and the stuff that takes effort and endurance. This is deep stuff. This is stuff that we cannot blow through or spin with a false positive. This may not be a very exciting time. Life may feel all too serious and heavy but as we know life and growth moves in cycles. There is a time for everything. I find tending to these deeper life cycles is absolutely necessary to be able to enjoy the light and free cycles that will come later. Let's break it all down...

Monday, Mercury stations retrograde at 15 degrees Capricorn. When Mercury stations it will be conjoined with Pluto and part of a square with Jupiter in Libra and Uranus in Aries. This is a cardinal cross. Cardinal energy initiates but the Capricorn side grounds this into the physical forms. Mercury retrograde is a time of reflection with our communications, so what we say, what we write, what we think, how we travel, what we learn and what we are teaching is needing review and perhaps a redo. The sign of Capricorn deals with duty, what we do that we want to be seen and public (the mask we wear), and the traditions of what we have been taught about how things should be and how life is "supposed" to go. The beauty of Capricorn is that through a lot of our life experiences we learn endurance, we learn how to work hard and focus when necessary and best of all we learn the rules of living in time and space and the here and now. Sometimes learning how to play the game is the name of the game and tending to the obvious and mundane serves us best so that we don't get ahead of ourselves. The shadow of Capricorn is that we can get so focused on accomplishing "the goal" that we lose touch with our heart and our passions. We forget that the dangling carrot is meaningless if we have lost ourself in its pursuit. Uranus in Aries is bringing us back to ourself, our desires, what we need and what gives us the fuel to feed our vital energies, what moves us express who we are in our most raw forms.  Otherwise, we are lost serving others desires and disconnected from our instincts that lead us. With Uranus involved this may happen through sudden loss, change, or unexpected events..like a lightening bolt something becomes apparent that we cannot ignore.  Jupiter in Libra (opposite to Uranus) is asking us to expand and deepen our understanding of who we are through partnership, finding balance from polarities, and opening our perspective to be more inclusive of each other and the mirror and insight the other brings to the table. We need people to mirror for us what we cannot see and experience on our own. Take all these aspects and make a soup and what do you get? You get a Mercury retrograde that is pivotal to our evolution and soul journey. We are on the brink of big shifts in how we perceive the world and how we process our life. This takes time to reflect on the messages and the learnings we have been doing and slowing down to see the signs and to learn from our experiences. What is it that you desire? What makes you feel alive? What themes have been coming up in your relationships time and time again? Where do your views isolate and polarize yourself into a corner..where is there room for a bridge, a new perspective? What beliefs and goals do you carry for others that need to be laid down in honor of what speaks to your heart? Where are you standing in your own way for growth? Perhaps these are the questions for yourself during this retrograde that ends on January 8th. We must be clear with ourselves and ensure that the energy and dedication that we are pouring into our endeavors are worth it. New inspirations and intentions are like new plants..easy to kill when we let the obligations to habit and our busyness get in the way. 

Monday, Mars goes into Pisces, a water sign. Mars is not so comfy here. Mars likes to penetrate and assert and is very "me, myself and I" focused and Pisces is nothing about that. Pisces is about dissolving, merging, unifying and taking us beyond what we can know and reason into the realm of infinite potential. This slows down our will to act and assert quite a lot. We may feel a little cloudy about what to do. This gives us a chance to feel, allow, and trust forces beyond what we can see and reason. We get to do it together and we get to remember that most of what we stress over now won't matter a bit in a week or a year or 10 years or lifetimes from now. We get permission to say "it's all good" for a bit. When we also slow down and tune out often it awakens a creativity and a spaciousness that cannot be found in our mad pursuit of what we think we need and how we think it needs to go. There is the quote you may have heard "Let Go and Let God", well that may not work all the time but for now...we could all stand to test this theory a bit. 

Wednesday, is Winter Solstice and the Sun moves into Capricorn. Solstice is time to honor the dark and all that the dark represents. This is the darkest week of the year and as we welcome lighter days ahead it is important to celebrate what the dark allows for..rest, quiet, internal focus, and the chance to see what is illuminated for us to lead us forward. This is such deep time to take a look back on your journey and honor what has taken you this far and where you have come from. Honor your roots, they hold an important piece of your story.. 

So, in this dark, deep, slow and reflective time, may we rest in the trust of the cycles of life and the natural cycles and rhythms of our own evolution. Often when we are at our darkest the light comes and inspires a new vision and a renewed hope for what lies ahead. When we allow the pause to fully occur and we rest, we are restored enough to endure what is asked of us in this next chapter. And just when we feel we have no idea what it all means and we let go of the questions and the resistance, we open to support and the answer we never saw coming and we realize we were never lost. 

"Sweet Darkness" by David Whyte

When your eyes are tired
the world is tired also.

When your vision has gone
no part of the world can find you.

Time to go into the dark
where the night has eyes
to recognize its own.

There you can be sure
you are not beyond love.

The dark will be your womb
tonight.

The night will give you a horizon
further than you can see.

You must learn one thing.
The world was made to be free in

Give up all the other worlds
except the one to which you belong.

Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet
confinement of your aloneness
to learn

anything or anyone
that does not bring you alive

is too small for you.

– “Sweet Darkness” by David Whyte, House of Belonging

 

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Calling our spirits home
Nov
27
6:00pm 6:00pm

Calling our spirits home

Happy new moon in Sagittarius! We have some big transits happening and this may feel extra intense for all you cardinal signs (Aries, Libra, Cancer and Capricorn) but the Mutable signs of (Pisces, Virgo, Gemini and Sagittarius) have plenty on their plates as well. It may look  like the fixed signs (Taurus, Scorpio, Leo and Aquarius) are home free but they won't be left out either. After all Mars is in Aquarius perhaps pushing buttons where you may feel bound. Lilith in Scorpio is still letting us feel and interact with our shadow. Life is always rich with stuff to work with we find! So let's start with the big transits...

We have the Sun in Sagittarius square the nodes of the moon. We also have Neptune conjunct the South Node of the moon. The nodes of the moon are about our path from the known to the unknown and the journey of our soul's expansion in its physical experience here. The South node is what we know and it can be where we hide. Sometimes we repeat what we know and can do because it's familiar and the grooves are deep in our karmic cycles but often what is familiar is not what we need or even truly want to live a full life. I am sure we all know what it is like to experience comfortable discomfort in our habitual behaviors and choices. This is what Neptune may be stirring up for us...where we are hiding out with our eyes closed. The north node in Virgo is calling us to taking practical, conscious, focused steps toward the direction of integration of what we know we need to do and to learn to continue our healing path. The Sun squaring the nodes brings some tension is the path. Often our growth isn't linear, we don't usually go from A to B. Often we go A to C to A to D to B...Sagittarius is about the deeper meaning, the deeper truths and what truly makes us feel alive and expansive. Saturn close by in Sag is allowing plenty of opportunity to take some interesting turns that lead to dead ends just to ensure we are feeling our way there and not allowing something outside ourselves to direct the path. The truth should taste like freedom and freedom may be a new taste in our mouth and perhaps we want to reject it as odd like a baby eating a new food. We may need to allow some time for our taste buds to develop a new sensitivity to something new. Saturn allows us plenty of that time as we learn that healing, evolving, truly expanding on all levels isn't a fast food like of experience but a fine dining take your time and savor the journey type of deal. Jupiter (now in Libra) rules Sagittarius so this theme of balance and harmony and perspective is also at play. I feel the integration of our masculine and feminine is at play as well. We are learning how to do more softly and how to be and receive more powerfully . This may be the integration piece that takes a little longer. It isn't just about asserting our will to change and grow but also listening, receiving and allowing more balance in how we are expanding. Mutable signs..this may be more obvious in your life right now. 

The other big transit is a cardinal cross happening with Uranus in Aries opposed to Jupiter in Libra and square Venus conjoined Pluto in Capricorn. Cardinal cross transits affect Home, Work, Identity and Relationships, so pretty much everything that matters to most of us! Uranus is Aries says, What do you want? What do you desire? Free those energies to flow. Follow your desire and be free to be yourself! Uranus may be causing some lightening bolt changes and chaos to let some of those desires see some light. Jupiter in Libra takes the other end of the spectrum and ask us to find more balance, harmony and a greater perspective through partnerships and through others. We get to partner with other humans to see another side, to give us depth in what we see so it isn't so one sided. We get to see that there are so many choices in what to do and how to do it, We also get to see that what we do does impact others and that matters. We don't live on this planet alone. Venus conjoined Capricorn breaks up that tug of war between those energies and says but what about your duties and obligations and what about the needs of others and what does your boss or your father say about it, or what has your lineage been doing? What is safe and what is practical..I mean there are rules to this and you should just follow them and do your job or your duty..no questions asked. No one cares about your feelings. The missing link to this cross is the Cancer archetype calling us to self care and our emotions. How do we really feel? Not what do we want.  Not what can someone else do or what does someone else need. Not what am I obligated or what should I do to keep tradition.  But, how do I feel about it? Do I feel cared for and seen in how I relate emotionally to what I am experiencing? I think this is an important question to bring us into our truth. Not that we are asking others to care for and tend to our emotions and give us validation but are we allowing our emotions to also guide our path so that we self-validate our choices and experiences? If we feel we are moving towards truth on our path, we should feel it and it should make us feel safe and cared for emotionally. We should not have to hide or suppress our feelings and we should not wallow in them too far that we want hide from the path of stepping outside and into the public with how we wear our truth inside and out. We are in a time of calling our spirits home so that we are directing our spirit and our journeys. If we are not directing the ship that means someone or something outside of ourselves are directing us. If we cannot self validate our truth then we will spend time and energy seeking this from the external and this will never allow us to roam free and unbound in this life. We must mature into our own wisdom and trust that there has been a deeper well of wisdom guiding us and that is available to support us as we take ownership of guiding our ship. So it is like our truth needs to check all the boxes: It allows our desires to be met with our attention and yet consciously expressed in way that we see partners with our world and those we share it with..we are building bridges with our world not walls. Letting others reflect what we may be missing to deepen our experience. It should feel supportive to our tender side and we should be aware of the impact our experiences have had in how we plot our courses. We can listen to others and reflect on our experiences but we must feel the truth inside instead of look outside to ensure we are on the right path. 

This morning we have the start of a new lunar cycle with the new moon in Sagittarius. This moon is conjunct the Sun so it too is a part of the square between the nodes. This is a time for an emotional rebirth. Fall in love with yourself again, and make time to get to know your spirit again like you would on a enchanting first date.  What does your spirit want? What do you need? What feels like it will set you free? There must be room for your spirit in the home of your body before we can allow it to guide us and expand us. That means we must take time to honor how we feel about the life we are living and the choices we are making. We must get to know what it feels like to feed our spirit and what it feels like when we deprive our spirit. This new moon allows us to call our spirits home to make a warm, inviting place in which to guide us onward and outward into the world of our choosing. 

 

 

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Timely Expansion
Nov
21
5:30pm 5:30pm

Timely Expansion

Welcome to the cycle of Sagittarius!  Today the sun moves out of watery, deep Scorpio and into the expansive, mutable fire sign of the "Sage or the Guru". This may assist us in lightening the deep emotional energy that we have been wading though the last month but we are not done in the feeling department with some key transits this week. So much is changing with all this mutable energy that wants to adapt and mutate into a more resonant form of expression. So, what is the sign of Sagittarius calling us to explore?  Sagittarius is the vision quest and the call to find the deeper meaning in our life and to expand the perception of who we are based on our truth.  Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter and Jupiter is in the sign of Libra right now so this truth that we are exploring is being influenced by our relationships, the draw for balance and equanimity and for creating more beauty and harmony in the world. We may be asked to ask if living our truth impacts the world in a way that creates balance and fairness for all or does our truth separate, divide and have people in the "right" and people in the "wrong". We just finished a Scorpio cycle revealing to us our shadow, illuminating what we fear or hide from. As uncomfortable as this is, feeling all that gets shaken up when we work with these topics and probing deeper, allows the groundwork for expansion. We can expand by getting "bigger" and adding more to our lives: more information, more tasks or roles that we play, obtaining more degrees or more status but at some point it gets watered down and just feels like excess and the meaning is minimized. There is another way we expand: by simplifying and going deeper towards what is truly meaningful, allowing less to be more. It is key to note that we don't necessarily expand by traversing down the well trodden path of least resistance and comfort, but more often than not when we experience discomfort, change, and allow for the unexpected to create a shift in our paradigm. A shift that may allow for our perceptions of truth to seem fuller and more comprehensive than we ever could have imagined. The other provides a way to fill in the gaps in how we see our truth expressed which is why relationships of all types assist in our expansion. Saturn in Sagittarius is helping us experience the limitations that sometimes allow us to try this other way of expanding: through trials and the school of hard knocks (where our experience teaches us the way) and through limiting our choices or pathways for which we may try to just add "more" in an attempt to expand. Saturn also teaches us that living and integrating into our truth takes time and is not an overnight job. 

Right now Jupiter in Libra is square Pluto in Capricorn. This quest for harmony for equality in relating with the other and our environment is really challenged by tradition, the way things have been, the patriarch where power in in the hands of a few.  Ideas like freedom, passion and being connected to the heart is ignored and dismissed. We can look at this concept collectively and within our own relationship with life. Where have you limited your expansion and your perception of your truth with what "the one in power or the know" told you it was to be? Where is the traditional path or the way "everyone else does it" disconnecting you from feeling free to explore alternative choices? Where are you adhering so firmly to a truth or a perception of reality that has you on the winning team and others on the opposite side? How do you become less stubborn and judgemental in order to see how another can offer us a chance to integrate the ideas of what truth looks like by providing a different perspective. Mars recently entered the sign of Aquarius so we are seeking to act in ways that free us from the norm and tap into the higher mind that has options outside of what the group knows and has done before. This truly calls us into a deeper conversation of what is unique and odd about how I assert myself that allows me to feel free to be me so that in my authentic being I serve not only myself but my community. 
 

Another big transit this week is Neptune in Pisces in an exact conjunction with the South Node of the moon. The south node of the moon is the path of least resistance, what we know best and the paths we can take in our sleep that are so habitual. Neptune is where we dissolve barriers of separation and find oneness. Neptune is the ocean where we tap into universal love. Neptune in Pisces in also where we are sleeping in illusion in order to wear our rose colored glasses and to escape truth and often times the pain that this truth carries wen we deny it. Neptune/Pisces is the collective unconscious and where we are all in denial of our interconnectedness and unity. This transit can be termed the end of illusion. The end of illusion for the ways in which we all act like we are separate and that what one does has no affect on the other. The end of illusion in the ways in which we run from a sober, compassionate look at our lives and who we are as part of the whole ( a drop in the ocean) and just as valuable and essential as any other. I am sure we can all name ways we as a culture, a county or the collective are in delusion of truths that do not draw more love, oneness, and connection to the world. On the same token, we can also probably acknowledge the ways in which we delude ourselves to the truth because often the truth means that we feel pain, experience change,  and are are asked to let go. In order to expand, heal, and integrate on our path (North Node in Virgo) we have to feel those emotions we want to deny.  We have to look compassionately at the areas of our life that seem broken and through our love of what is we can fully accept ourselves.  We can turn inward and open outwardly. We can begin to see that you are another me. We all feel pain. We all suffer. We all want to avoid both of these things. And when we take the veil away, we are left with the open space of the heart. This is the space in which this universal love can flow and create bridges so that what has been separated can now be united. This is too is how we expand. 

So in our quest to expand and to deepen our understanding of who we are, we are being asked to recognize all the falsity along the way. Sometimes destruction is the only way to rebuild a more healthy and vibrant reality. Sometimes the way to get bigger is to get smaller first and deal with the unfinished business that we abandoned along the way that was essential for our integration. Maybe we need to let go of some ideas in order to focus the energy on less and allow it to be fuller. Maybe we need to stop seeking truths outside ourselves and look at what the other and our environment is showing us about the truth that is within us. Maybe our truth is relative to how much we are willing to look outside our habits and our comfort zone and into the world with a sense of spaciousness that our truths should be able to coexist with harmony.

 

 

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Temple Light
Nov
13
6:30pm 6:30pm

Temple Light

What a time for a full moon! As if there were not enough emotions and chaos already! Monday at 5:52am our moon will be full in the sign of Taurus. This moon will be the brightest that we have seen in 70 years as it is closest to the earth than usual. The sabian symbol for this full moon is "white dove flying over troubled waters: the spiritual inspiration that comes to the individual in the overcoming of crisis." This symbology reminds us of the Noah and the ark story, a story of bold courage and faith. In this story we are taught that through the endurance of the crisis with the right spirit there is a reward for the faithful, there is a promise of rebirth in a new and profound way. We need to capture this hope faith and the spirit of transformation despite the floods or crisis that we are experiencing currently. 

The sun has been transiting through Scorpio and is now conjoining with Black Moon Lilith...this is deep emotion, this is death, this is facing of fears, this is the shadow. We have an even larger flashlight highlighting where we have been asleep both individually and collectively, where we have been drinking the Kool-aid and pretending that all is well and pulling the cover over our eyes. Scorpio doesn't let you sleep. Pluto rules this sign and Pluto is Shiva forces of transformation. The ugly comes to the surface, the repressed, the dark forces are out of the closets. This is not a time to run and exacerbate our fears. Pluto is asking us to see where dysfunction abounds, see where the darkness has hid our light, our power, our truth and to break it down and rebuild something that endures. In facing the fears and the reality of where our unconscious choices have landed us we reclaim the power to make changes that serve the greater and that are more balanced and equitable (Jupiter in Libra opposite Pluto and square Uranus in Aries). When we gain the greater perspective, by seeing the dark and the hidden we can free ourselves from the chains of ignorance and closed mindedness. We free our minds to tap into potential and growth..expansion. Uranus is Aries has us all feeling our desires, touching our anger and our frustrations. We need to channel these deep, instinctual energies and focus them for fuel to make changes that unify. 

Taurus is an earth sign that is ruled by Venus. When the moon is in Taurus we connect to our bodies, what we love, how we enjoy the earth and the sensual pleasures of life.  We all are worthy and have the right to do this but we live in world where this can be trumped by unjust laws, prejudice, and control by those in power. This is where we need to use the emotional energy, of Scorpio,  the wild and chaotic energy of Aries, and make a home for these energies in our bodies.  It is vital that we allow it to have a pathway of release that is in the "right" spirit.  Taurus invites us to slow down and we take our time to be still and to ground. We can then harness our energies for the long haul. We can also transform this energy to catalyze our passions. This inspires us to be the lights we came to be individually so that collectively we are a great force of brilliance and truth. So, in this full moon, get into your body. Care for your body in honoring the house of your spirit and your emotions and stabilize this shelter so that you can become a fortress of light. If we hold on to the energy it can cause us to retreat and to become rigid. If we let the energy take over us we feed the fears, the pain and the wounds of the world by increasing their power. If we stabilize this energy and re-direct it towards that which inspires us to stand firm and tall with what is of the light and the truth then we all get stronger and we all can endure the floods and the storms together. 

Take care of your own inner temple, tend to your own shadow so that in your integration and transformation, you stoke your own inner light. Then stand firm in your light. We don't know what is before us, but we can know and trust that which is within us to illuminate the path.

Blessings and love...

 

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Greeting our Ghosts with Gratitude
Nov
1
8:30pm 8:30pm

Greeting our Ghosts with Gratitude

This week we celebrate Halloween, Samhain and the start to November and I don't know about you but the spook is not in the costumes but in the vibes and intensity that is all around us. We are still deep into the Scorpio waters digging into our fears and our shadow and that reveals a lot of stuff that we may feel like we want to stuff back into the closet and quickly bolt down the door. Scorpio offers intensity, strong emotions and a chance to understand what is directing our lives under the surface or outside of our awareness. We may have to face that we have some beliefs/memories that are keeping us stagnant, disempowered or held hostage. Maybe we got them from our parents, religion, or maybe they came through our lineage from many lifetimes. It does not really matter the hows or the whys it matters that we know what we are giving our power to. The gift of what Scorpio offers is a chance to lay to rest that which no longer belongs to hold our power. We get to let the (*&^ die. What do we gain? Death may not seem like a gift as we go through it (I certainly can attest to that). The gift is depth. We are able to live consciously from a deeper place. A place where we can accept the shadow parts of ourself. We can accept and make space for deep feelings that have the capacity to release BIG energy. Think about a limiting or misguided belief you hold that keeps you in fear. Although you may not know it, it directs what you do, what you choose, how you frame your life. That belief holds a tremendous power over your life. You may think it is "protecting you" or you are protecting yourself but really the fear is the obstacle to reclaiming your power. The ability for you to face head on what you fear and to challenge that belief/memory and create a different outcome. Once you do and you feel the texture and taste of fear and you challenge the belief and maybe even let it die, what power you will unleash to create a new pattern, new choices and new frameworks in which to relate to your life. Fearlessness is not overcoming fear and abolishing our tendency to feel fear. Fear has a valid place in our life to keep us alert and conscious of our surroundings and our place within them. Fearlessness is the ability to not be restrained by fear. We cultivate the courage to feel it and touch it deeply on many layers and we move within it as best as we can. We gain a sense of internal power that can be touched deeply by life and yet it does not lie down and give up and hide. 

But how do we meet our shadow and all these scary parts of ourselves that are showing up?  I certainly know that when I see my shadow often my inner critic comes in to tell me how I need to clean this up pronto and by the way how did I get so twisted? I also see the part of me that wants to gloss over it and pretend it isn't that bad and looks to blame someone or something else.  I also meet the analytical part of me that that needs to make up a story or over analyze the whys about it dropping out of the feelings and right into the cozy place of my mind where it can spiral over and over again until I give up in exhaustion blaming confusion as my obstacle. I have found that how we meet the shadow is just as important as what it is. Remember Scorpio invites us to deep feeling and that does not require the mind or any logic along. I am learning that we must stay within the feeling and greet it with compassion, kindness, and space to be. Friday, Venus in Sagittarius will square Chiron in Pisces. Venus is still within a close orb of Saturn and these planets are still square the nodes of the moon. So, what we are feeling are our wounds (Chiron in Pisces). We are feeling them deeply. These are parts of ourself that have separated from our identity and our wholeness. Venus and Saturn in Sag may have us feeling a little judgemental about them or maybe we pick up on a statement that was told to us about this shadow aspect (what we think is "bad" about ourself), maybe we see where a religion told us this was a sin or bad or undesirable. Maybe our partner even told us we were not good enough when this shadow emerged and we were told we needed to fix it. The north node (our call to evolution) is offering the path to integration and we cannot integrate what has been separated. When I judge myself and try to fix myself incessantly I want to give up because all I find are more flaws. I need to find unconditional love for myself and acceptance. This is not the same thing as giving up or glossing over. This is feeling to heal. This is acceptance of what is so that there is an opportunity to rewrite the script in a a more truthful way. A way that allows for shadow to exist but not rule us from underground. The funny thing is that when I accept what it then I can heal it and change it to support my wholeness. Sunday, Mercury in Scorpio in inconjunct Uranus in Aries. We can free ourselves when we see what beliefs and mantras are holding us and this includes the mantra that I must obliterate my shadow. Uranus says be your freaky self and when you own yourself fully you are free to exist in the ways that give you power to express your individuality. When we see our shadow and greet it with this compassion we are actually inspired to make the healthy changes that support our growth and evolution. 

I want to share a practice I use daily and frequently when I uncover shadow or uncomfortable emotions or situations. It is called the "Ho'oponopono. Here is a link to more information about it. The mantra is "I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you. " I say it with as much sincerity as I can over and over again. It is the chance to meet your wounded parts with compassion and love. I have found this much more comforting and inspiring than the shame method. :)

So, blessings to you all as we all greet the freaky with perhaps a little more kindness. 

The moon this week: Tuesday-Thursday: Sagittarius (Fire), Friday-Saturday: Capricorn (Earth), Sunday: Aquarius (Air)

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Diving Deep
Oct
25
1:30pm 1:30pm

Diving Deep

The waters of Scorpio are upon us inviting us to the underworld of shadow, and all things dark, mysterious and hidden. The Sun, now Mercury and Black Moon Lilith are all in the fixed water sign of Scorpio. Fixed energy concentrates and stabilizes the current energy and water brings us in touch with our emotions so put that together and we get to climb deep into the well of our emotional bodies to uncover what might be lurking beneath our physical masks. Scorpio is about merging with the other in all the ways we do (relational,financial, sexual, ie shared stuff) and the effect this has on our power and our ability to transform and bring to the light what we want to hide from because it causes us to feel exposed and vulnerable. Scorpio puts the spot light on all the skeletons we have in our closet, what we fear, what we deny, what we avoid, and what we project onto another. When we fear something we all too often do all we can to try to avoid it all costs, manipulating and pulling out all the stops to not go "there". The problem is that in our false sense of control, we end up being controlled by our fears and we give our power away. Often times we mistake control for power but the truth is that when we stop trying to control we find our power. The shadow is an essential part of who we are. We all have a dark side. It is that trait that we hide, it is how we act when the %^&$ hits the fan, it is where our deepest secrets and fantasies lie, and where we feel a wound we need to cover up. We feel vulnerable and afraid to look at this "ugly" and "undesirable" parts of ourself because it evokes emotions that are less than enjoyable to experience. Often it takes a relationship to stir up and draw out these aspects of ourself so we can feel what we repress and see what we hide from. This is the value in the other. Scorpio is ruled by Pluto, and Pluto doesn't mess around. Pluto is the soul and he packs a powerful punch in the way in which this planet is vested in our transformation and evolution. Scorpionic relationships feel that sting. They are intense, they take us out of our "control" and they allow us to feel the deep emotional layers that are ready to be felt and processed for our transformation. So this time is intense friends. This time is a chance to turn around and face what is chasing us and causing us to run fast and furiously away from ourselves. When we turn around, we will meet our shadow and in facing our shadow and the truth of who we are dark as well as light, we feel this truth on a deep level and the power that unleashes. 

Tuesday: Venus in Sagittarius squares Neptune in Pisces: Venus is Sag is taking our relationships to a more truthful and aligned destination. This rub with Neptune will invoke perhaps the chance to meet the delusion we create in our relationships that keep us from being aligned in our truth. Maybe we take on another's truth, or the truth that globally the the others subscribe to in order to be loved or accepted by another. Maybe we don't want to face how we truly feel. This is a chance to take our relating to our heart and our center..what does truth taste like..freedom or something far from it?

Thursday: Sun in Scorpio merges with Mercury in Scorpio: We get to shine the light on our fear based thoughts and what stories we create perhaps to keep them hidden or recycling. What we can see and perceive, we can shift and heal. What we do not see or perceive control us.

Friday: Mars in Capricorn square Uranus in Aries: Motivated by fear, duty, obligation and the "shoulds" or motivated by freedom. Uranus argues for a shake up and the chance to break free from the ways in which we suppress our desires. Honor your unique and awkward aspects, if you have to tuck them away chances are you are falling into the Capricorn energy of suppression and masking. Tradition and time tested methods are only as good as they work for you. What allows your spirit to fly?

Saturday: Venus in Sagittarius conjoins with Saturn in Sagittarius and squares the Nodes of the Moon: Anytime Saturn joins the mix we are facing a maturity test if our time tested, experience based wisdom compared with what those in know told us. This is a time of reflection on relationship truths and what we were told is right and wrong and bad and good and what we know to be true because we have been there and done that. When we follow our truth we grow and we feel more aligned in something that we can stand on with more certainty and with an expansiveness. When we follow the truths of others we feel like we have are carrying a heavy backpack full of another's truths. What is in your relationship backpack?

Sunday: New Moon in 7 degrees Scorpio at 10:38AM: A new moon is a seed time to plant an intention and feel and observe its growth through this next lunar cycle. Look for the house in your chart ruled by Scorpio to find the "where" in your life that this intention may best fit what you are experiencing. Also, key into any Scorpio planets you have or what lies in your 8th house! What is this new moon about? The sabian symbol for this new moon is "Deep sea divers: The will to explore the hidden depths of all experiences and to search for primordial causes." This new moon invites us to the quest of understanding what lies under the surface of daily living. We go into our deep waters to see what is there with courage, intense awareness and compassion. What are you afraid of? What fears make you run? These are the fears that impact your daily life, the decisions you make, the actions you are willing or unwilling to take, the mantras that play in your mind and the space you are willing to take. When we are willing to walk into the dark waters of what lies in our subconscious we take some of the mystery out of whys of what is occurring in our life. We are able to find strength and power in what we uncover. "Don't turn away, keep your gaze on the bandaged place. That is where the light enters you."- Rumi Breathe deep dear ones, spend some time in deep presence. Feel into where you experience the depth of your emotions and ask the questions you may be afraid to ask of yourself. "The boundary to what we can accept is the boundary to our freedom."

The Moon this week: Tuesday-Wednesday: Leo (fire), Thursday-Friday:Libra (air), Saturday-Sunday: Scorpio (water)

May we all find courage in the net of our community to explore the depths of our own waters knowing that we all swim in the same ocean!

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The fluid nature of balance
Oct
9
6:30pm 6:30pm

The fluid nature of balance

What a week of planetary transits..so much going on..where to start? Let's start broad..the over arching them of this time is from the archetype of Libra. We are exploring themes of balance, partnership and beauty and how these themes work to give us perspective and clarity with our lives. This clarity and perspective may be welcomed and it may also be challenging as sometimes what we see reflected through partnerships is what we hide and avoid seeing in ourselves. Sometimes in working with the concept of balance we have to explore what is not balanced. And often in the pursuit of seeking beauty we are expanded to to further define beauty by the messy and often rough edges of life that have their own flare and luster. Mercury will conjoin Jupiter Tuesday in Libra so we may have many messages and opportunities coming our way to work with these themes.  So many perhaps that it can be difficult to make up your mind or to find the simple truth of it all. You may feel like when deciding that there is truth to each option. That is a gift and curse of Libra. The gift is that we can move out of polarized thinking. Right and wrong. The curse is that you become indecisive or wishy washy. Libra is balanced by Aries. Aries is nothing about sharing ideas or seeking input from the outside. Aries is all about me, my and mine. My desires. My life. My needs. Aries although very unconscious is very in touch with the internal, guttural desires and visions within. Aries is a fire sign so we are called back into vision and spirit, our identity. When you are feeling stuck or indecisive, go back in and check in to what you feel. What allows an expression of your deep desires, what is unique to you? Libra gives you feedback and the ability to refrain from tunnel vision and selfish thinking but you have to start a little selfish and internal or else you are at the risk of following the desires of what the other wants and directs. 

Capricorn (ruled by Saturn) provides that reference for us right now. Pluto and Mars are both in cardinal earth Capricorn. Duty, obligation, old paradigm and the beliefs we were told to embody are all circling around us right now and bothering our easy progress forward. While Capricorn teaches us hard work, endurance, maturity and reflection, what is can also do is let us learn about repression. Don't go doing X...that won't make you any money. Y won't get you a get you a good job with potential. Healthy relationships look like Z. Capricorn is really good at pushing down those desires to be untethered and selfish and says..look at the whole. We need you to do this or that. We need everyone to follow the rules and play the game. But, the gift of Capricorn is to learn which game you want to play and to use your talent and resources for the right team. Return again to that fire (Saturn is now in Sagittarius), your truth. This is what we are learning, what is my truth and how can I allow it to ebb and flow and be revised over time and be messy? How do I partner and maintain my truth yet allow it do deepen through my experiences with others? We can allow ourselves to edit our truth as we mature. (Sagittarius is a mutable sign, energy is adapted to be more useful). If we know our truth in this moment, then we know where to start. 

Truth is a funny thing. It is not always bright and shiny. There is an element to our truth that is dark and hidden. This truth gets revealed when we merge deeply with another. There is a darker, shadowy side to our relationships right now as Venus in Scorpio has been in rendezvous with Black Moon Lilith. Nothing says shadow like Scorpio and Lilith. Shadow is truly nothing to fear or hide from, as it is truly the missing piece of beauty to our perfectly imperfect human selves. We all have shadow. No one gets to bask in the light forever. So this is a time of meeting what triggers us and no easier and faster way than through another, especially a partner. What is surfacing in your partnerships that causes you to lose your cool, to become that person you don't recognize for that brief moment. Now is the time to bring these topics, these wounds, these fears to the light to see with new perspective. We get the larger view of life and ourselves when we know what is driving our responses and motivations below the surface. Scorpio deals with a lot with power.  There is a lot of power we reclaim to step forward into our life when we know our habitual game plan that may be overplayed and not so successful and the game plan that we are learning to play a new kind of game. A  decent coach knows his players well; their strengths and their weaknesses, Knowing a players weakness can allow the coach options: work with the player to improve their weakness and to overcome fear of it, or to minimize the impact of the weakness by playing a more intelligent game. This is where Saturn in Sagittarius square the moon nodes (our past and our future calling) is coming in. When we can tell the truth to ourself about ourself, we can move our of denial or delusion (the past) and we can integrate our past and our current experiences to allow us to heal and to expand (future). We expand into the truth of who we are on a larger scale not the truths that we adopted from others based on how we felt we needed to behave. Part of our shadow is where we didn't feel accepted and whole to be this part of ourself so we hide it.  When we bring those missing links to the surface our truth is deepened. We reclaim essential self knowledge that we need to partner with more balance. 

Saturday, we have a full moon in 23 degrees Aries. What a full moon it will be! The moon is conjunct Uranus, so look for breakthroughs, the unexpected, a unique revelation in the realm of your desires and need to free yourself from how you know and assert yourself. "Freedom from the Known" is a trademark of Uranus. The moon is opposite the Sun, Jupiter and Mercury all in Libra. So how will this Aries energy be reflected in your partnerships in your environment and how does it speak to the balance of things in your life? Mars and Pluto in Capricorn are square to this full moon, brining in that extra rub of the past, the shoulds, the expectations and what you have been told about who you are and how life is played with others. What a confusing mix of energies to work with? Confusing if we only think about it. We have earth, air and fire all at play and what is missing? Water. Feelings. Flow. I feel the invitation on this full moon, is to realize that balance is a very fluid concept. We are told what works for others what it should look like for success. We are in predator and prey relationships to feel both and to learn the middle ground by gaining the experience of the feelings of both. With earth there is concrete evidence in our manifestations for what we are working with. Look at your reality. What message is it speaking to you?  We have desires that we must express and allow to flow and we need to recognize that what we do does affect the environment. This is all a dance and there is no getting it dialed in because just when we do, we learn something else that offsets the scales. I think we are learning to see with softer, more open eyes (seeing the mirror that is all around us). We are learning to feel with a more compassionate touch (we are all a mix of shadow and light). We are learning to think with a more vast and open space (can we think bigger than black and white). Our senses are giving us present time feedback to listen and discern. We must learn to use all of them in a more balanced approach. Relying only on one and we get a skewed distorted image. Even out the lens to accommodate all the gifts of our intelligences (mental, physical, emotional, spiritual) and we have a more balanced image in which to see our life. This will be very unique to each of us yet comprehensive as we partner with other and learn and expand from our interactions. Welcome to your own fluid nature in  finding balance. You will never arrive, you will just become the master at artfully crafting your present time interpretation of it in this moment!

Blessings to you all my friends!

The moon: Monday-Tuesday: Aquarius (fixed air), Wed-Thursday: Pisces (mutable water), Friday-Saturday: Aries (cardinal fire), Sunday: Taurus (fixed earth)

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Out of the cocoon
Sep
26
3:30pm 3:30pm

Out of the cocoon

We have officially celebrated the Fall Equinox and the Sun has officially moved into Libra.  You may feel the balance of the elements now as we shift from the focused water and fire elements into a more even spread of all of the elements. The introduction of the air element has been a nice change (Jupiter and the Sun in Libra). With air we gain perspective, we dance with change, we learn and  communicate with others and our environment. All the internal Virgo energy may have had you feeling like you were in a cocoon, nestled into your own focused world of thoughts, plans and healing. Now it is time to break out of that cocoon and take in the wider view and to relate with others. We need to broaden our perspective before we emerge from this cocoon with our new wings. We may come to realize that we don't have it all figured out and that we really cannot do it alone.  Living in our safe cocoon can keep us in the "what about me" cycles of thoughts where we can be so self focused that we forget that there is an unbiased world out there and our actions do affect others. In our draw to stay hidden and tucked in tight we forget that whatever we are experiencing will pass as all situations succumb to the truth that nothing is static.  Thank goodness that discomfort, fear, pain will pass at some point! We also can rob ourselves from the inspiration that others provide when they model rising above challenges, the empathy that we can see in another's face that has faced adversity, loss and pain.  The other is such a necessary ingredient in our healing and evolution. Taking in the information reflected in our environment is essential if we want to co create and partner with life. We can pigeon hole ourself into what we think will happen and how we feel it should unfold only to miss what is meeting us and inviting us to a new and unexplored way of living. This is the Sun conjoined Jupiter in Libra. Libra is Cardinal energy and so new things are being initiated. We are starting something a new way and so the old ways won't be so helpful. Our experience is not useless but we must take it and enhance it a bit with some new spices. Jupiter is our fast track to growth and expansion and in the sign of Libra we need another for this kind of growth. "The time of the lone wolf is over. " The other gives us an element of truth we may miss. The other is not here to tell us what to do or that we are wrong, but to invite us out of polarized thinking (I am right and therefore you are wrong. Black or white?)We learn to compromise. We learn to soften the hard edges of where we dig our heels in for security. We also get to see the mirror of what we may be unable to see. Nothing like a relationship to let you work with what you would never dabble in alone. Some relationships take you to your edge of comfort just to prove to you that there was more of you that you have not met and more growth is possible. No one says relationships are easy but they are the best way to teach us what we will never learn solo. Jupiter in Libra will also teach us how to be met by life and that there is countless ways to go and opportunities before us. We get to take those Virgo intentions for our integration and look around for how we will be met in making those a reality. It may not look the way we thought but if our eyes are open wide we won't miss where the support is coming from and where we are being led. 

Tuesday, Mars moves into the sign of Capricorn. Mars is less comfortable in a yin earth sign but Capricorn is cardinal energy so this helps us tap into the endurance to take our desires and inspirations forward. Capricorn calls for self discipline to learn from our experiences and to apply the wisdom of our experiences to the means in which we want to accomplish our goals. With Capricorn the temptation is to do our work as a means to an end. When we add our heart and our passions to what we do, we add the sweetness that allows the journey to unfold with authenticity. With Capricorn we also face karma and our traditions as possible standards we place before ourselves. Remember Saturn (Capricorn's ruler) in Sagittarius is reminding us that we are the holder's of our truth and our truth should be the standard not another's. So, take the truths you have been discovering and add the discipline of doing the work step by step as you move forward into this new phase.

Friday at 5:11pm we welcome a new moon in Libra (8 degrees). A new moon is a seed time to plant intentions and watch the growth reflected back through the lunar cycle. This new moon is conjoined Jupiter and the Sun in Libra as well and within a close orb to a square to Mars in Capricorn and Pluto in Capricorn.  Take the urges of Mars to start the work of setting our heart based and truth oriented goals with Pluto's call to evolve past our fears and limitations of the past based on what we were "told" and how they did it and then mix it up with this Libra energy and what do we get? We get to power and inspiration to merge from the cocoon and into a welcoming world of opportunities to be met and supported. With Pluto in this mix we meet our evolution and any time we are in the midst of transformation it can make us feel alone, frightened, and clingy to security. Transformation is *&^&^% tough! I am finding that this is where we are feeling those deep fears and insecurities is where we are closest to big expansion and new growth. What if the caterpillar chose to stay in the cocoon for fear of the other side? We need to remember that we are not alone on this path. We need each other. The universe is giving us messages all the time. There is support all around us. Even in the eyes of a fellow seeker just as confused and scared as we are, it is evidence that we are all doing it as best we can. Let's open our eyes and look up, around and within. Partnership is the name of the game! No one promises it won't hurt as we emerge from the cocoon and that the work won't be difficult, but the the reward of flying as a butterfly speaks for itself. 

The moon this week:

Tuesday-Wednesday: Scorpio (water); Thursday-Friday: Sagittarius (fire); Saturday-Sunday: Capricorn (earth)

Love to you all!

 

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The space between
Sep
19
7:30pm 7:30pm

The space between

Whether you felt like last's week's energy was like throwing yourself into an ocean of hot emotional soup without a flotation device or you wondered what all the fuss was about, we are survived the Pisces eclipse and full moon of last week. This week the energy starts to stabilize and the intensity may seem to lessen a bit (please!). Mercury goes direct on Wednesday. Communications should improve and feel more easeful and perhaps we have had time to reflect on where we can improve our focus to aid in our healing, wellbeing and integration (hone in on where your body has been speaking to you often through pain). Thursday the Sun moves into cardinal air sign, Libra, and Friday Venus moves out of Libra into intense and emotionally rich Scorpio. The theme of stepping outside of duality/polarities will begin to shine a little brighter as the sun shifts into Libra.  This should support what has been set into motion by the eclipse. Whatever is present now emotionally and mentally be it pain, confusion, joy, or a conglomeration of many things, we can remind ourselves that it simultaneously the accumulation of what was started at some prior point that is ending having come full circle and something has been set into motion, a seed that is ready to begin its process of growth and maturation. This eclipse may have spotlighted a certain something for you to  now see from a less biased and fixed mentality. With Libra we are welcoming in intelligent perspective, balance and partnership. Libra is a cardinal air sign, so we are working in the realm of the mind to initiate and forge ahead with new energy. On the equinox we see the duality of the season: the ending of summer, the celebration of what has been harvested and we get to taste the bounty of what we have been working and tending from our hearts. On the flip side we have to choose what to keep tending that will sustain us into winter and what to let go of in appreciation and realization of how it served its full purpose. As we let go of the form of what was harvested the essence still remains within us and can be now applied towards where we are next journeying. 

This strong sense of duality and life in the space between it has been so evident recently. I notice than when I am feeling scared, uncertain and experiencing peak emotions as in the last week, the draw is to gravitate away from discomfort and pain and to cling towards what feels good and comfortable. This tends not to work out so well as maybe you have also found. One of the beliefs that I think Saturn is asking us to mature during its time in Sagittarius is that bad things happen (we experience pain) because we are being punished and when things are good and we feel life is ticking along according to our liking that we are being rewarded for good behavior. A fundamental truth of the universe that I am discovering is the universe is unbiased. Pain and happiness are just cycles like the seasons and they are not to be taken so personally. We all get to experience both throughout all of our lives. When we live in hope and fear we ascribe to dualistic philosophy. We will meter our behavior to avoid the one side of life that seems to be unavoidable as it is a just simply a season like fall and we will suffer. Nature cannot take offense that the leaves fall off the trees just as nature is not being rewarded when the flowers bloom. When we are clinging to one side then we are blocking the flow of life. We block our innate wisdom, our growth, the tools that are before us to support us, and we block the flow that will allow the emotions or pain to dissipate as nothing lasts forever. We also block our ability to see the spaciousness of possibility in between the polarities. There is so much potential and possibility between our hopes of what will happen to gain happiness and our fears of what may happen that may cause pain. When our thinking and actions are polarized we are frozen with an "either or" mentality. Life is rarely black or white. Mars in Sagittarius is teaching us that our actions are not right or wrong, we need to ask a different question from a wider lens.  What actions allow us to expand and to trust that there is potential for more than the small mind can perceive? What actions line up with our truth in this moment? What actions let us breathe deeper and let go of fixation and holding onto what we know to make room for the mysterious possibility? These are the themes of Jupiter in Libra and the Sun moving through Libra will give us more fuel for this topic.

This has even been applying to our relationships as Venus has been transiting though Libra. When we need to be right then the other has to be wrong. When we can only sit with our point of view there is no space for a more expansive and inclusive perspective. The broader truth should reveal that it is not "either or  but "BOTH and more". If we cling to what we think and know then we will feel like a ping pong ball bouncing from pain to happiness non-stop. That is exhausting and will deplete our vital energies. There is a more harmonious way to relate to ourselves and each other. For sure it feels more comfortable to cling to what we know and how we feel we are right and justified. It is totally un-grounding, spacious, and scary to accept that most likely there is more to the story we are telling ourselves. Venus will leave Libra this week and move into Scorpio (things may get a little intense relationally) so we can start to do the work of shifting and healing the ways in which we cling towards these poles for our comfort and security so that we can take back our power to remain calm and carry on in the spacious place of possibility and the unknown. The possibility that we have to face our fears instead of building up walls around them,  to see where we are clinging, accept the fact that we may not know how it will go or what the results will be... I am seeing that the gift of Libra is an open mind. When we accept that we don't have to live in the comfort of our dualism then we have a lot more life to take in and interact with. We can start to meet life in the middle. We can meet others in this center space of "I don't know" but I am willing to learn as I go. I am willing to see more space around the grasp of what I know and what I want. We introduce the freedom of working with life and others to partner moment by moment. We get to change the ingrained neural pathways of how we have always done it and we open new ones that may allow us to see the vast terrain of unexplored land before us. 

As we complete this Virgo cycle, Chiron in Pisces has been a strong presence calling us to our own healing. When we face uncertainty, our fears, and the pain that we avoid with this openeness and are willing to say "I don't know" then the healing can take place. I have found that often my need to fix, understand, control, and hold on to the questions prevents me from the spaciousness it takes to accept the healing that is available for me. Questioning and thinking about it is another way for me to hold on and seek security and protection. Healing is not linear and we cannot reason our way though it. When we cease the struggle to know, perhaps we will find that all we need to know will come in due time. Support for our growth will come as we need it and our deep wisdom that knows exactly what to do to heal can lead us. Unwalled and unguarded we find the space of our hearts and the heart of the universe, a universe that is willing to partner with us though it all. Perhaps we will find the beauty in it all instead of the two sides. 

May a new perspective be the lighthouse to the unfolding a new experience of life created  moment by moment. 

 

 

 

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Embracing Uncertainty
Sep
12
10:00am10:00am

Embracing Uncertainty

Can you feel it? If we all pause for long enough I am certain we can all feel the heightened awareness of these times. On a very deep level we may be aware of the subtle or profound shifts that are allowing for healing to occur on all levels. This Friday we complete the eclipse season with a lunar eclipse in Pisces on the South Node of the moon dealing with our past, karma, and endings. Pisces is the universal solvent, the place of undoing and surrender to the vast essence of life. Pisces is also the ocean of infinite potential and universal love. What is ending? Anything and everything! It can be our fixed ways of thinking, relating, living and seeing ourselves and each other that keep us feeling separate and wounded or in control. It can be our innocence to the reality of situation that needs tending. Relationships, jobs and situations that despite our clinging could be coming to a close. All of these endings bring so much uncertainty. We are caught with our hands open  in the spaciousness of the present where so much is possible yet nothing is certain. The medicine for this time? Be present, know that the only certainty is held in the embodied present moment.  Be certain you are fully here and here being in your body and not your thoughts about this moment. Become humbled in all the ways in which you struggle and choose to remain in resistance to what is and what has been, this humbleness will allow us to see ourselves in each other and bring us together on this path. No one has it all figured out. No one has a clean record. But when you can truly see with clarity the fullness of who you are you become a servant to your healing and the healing of our world. Make peace with what is, your pain, your imperfections, your past and your uncertainty with what the future holds. Connect and stay open in your heart so that you can feel the connection that we have to each other when we become warriors of love. This love starts as an inside job yet has the capacity to change the world as we know it. That is what this eclipse is about, embracing ourselves in our uncertainty. 

The Sun in Virgo has been taking us on the ride of focus and discernment. It has also been a path to healing our bodies. (Anyone else been dealing with all those body aches and pains highlighting where we may have opportunities to open some energy?) We are sorting through the necessary and the non-essential of our life and sensing where we need some focused effort to allow for greater wellness and integration of what is worthy. (Body pain may direct this attention, mind you.) This is all and good as long as we are not fixated in perfecting every flaw we uncover and judging and separating the self we are learning more about (this is good and this is bad about me). This week retrograde Mercury, calling us into a deeper reflection into these Virgo themes, conjoins the sun prior to the eclipse. We are perhaps seeing some extra light and attention on where we feel we need to improve, clean up along the lines of our inner communication. We are witnessing a lot of our thoughts and perhaps how they may impact our improvement or our propensity to keep us spiraling in patterns that do not serve us. This is a call to create new neural pathways in our brain by first realizing where we seem to short circuit our progress. Where do we continue to get hooked (deny, check out, project onto others)? Once we can  know our triggers we can choose new responses to our habitual patterns.  We cannot control what triggers us but we can control our response. Presence will allow us to choose new patterns once we see how the old patterns affect us on a body, mind and soul layer. It must be said that doing this work is very difficult especially when we get to those places that we don't want to go and have been avoiding. Here is where Chiron will come in to help....

Chiron is conjoined to the moon during this eclipse. Chiron is our wound, what we can see and serve to others without giving to ourselves. Chiron in Pisces is where we feel separate due to our imperfections, our pain, our illusions and where our stories keep us confirming a reality that does not exist. There is no such thing as a true story. There is the present and our awareness in real time reality and there is our story about it. Sometimes we retell our stories over and over again in our mind because we think they protect us from the truth that will hurt and cause us to feel pain. The truth is our stories keep us from feeling our pain and healing. With Chiron we are asked to put aside our stories and to feel deeply into what we are hiding from. To lean into our pain and to get into the space of our heart. In this space we can tend to our pain and instead of seeing it as our flaw to fix, it can be our gift. When we see all parts as necessary components of our wholeness then we unite and integrate. When separation is dissolved healing occurs. When we have touched pain and our tenderness deeply we are more willing to be compassionate and empathetic to others in theirs. This is what Pisces teaches, to dissolve barriers. This is universal love. We are not in this alone. Even in our deepest, darkest places there is company. Others paths may not look the same, others triggers may not mirror yours but we all have them. Remembering this helps us choose to act with compassion. Does beefing up your defenses and proving your righteousness ever make the pain go away for good? Does story telling ease the suffering for the long haul? The sweetness we can offer another is purely a reflection of the sweetness that we are able to offer ourselves. Healing brings us to that same uncertainty. How do we heal? What does surrender look like? What does leaning into the pain feel like? We are again left in the vast ocean of spaciousness and presence. Remember, though you are not swimming alone!

The last piece of this eclipse is Mars in Sagittarius square to Chiron conjoined the Moon and square to the Sun. Mars in Sagittarius has inspired us to be wiser in our actions. Can we expand the way we act to draw from a deeper place of truth and wisdom instead of just effort for action's sake? We are also being asked to expand our paradigm of ourselves to be outside of the polarities of right and wrong. Rather than trying to use external measures to dictate our efforts we are asked to draw upon the wisdom that it is never either or but both and more. We do not have certainty in any action we take or any outcome we intend other than the certainty that in this moment this action feels in truth and alignment with who we are today. We must remember that we are always expanding and so we must allow for our molds of our self to be made of soft clay and not hard stone. We must be firm in our ability to act decisively when necessary and also to be able to withhold action and float when action is a way of escaping the uncertainty of the present moment. 

In the fall we see the commencement of the football season.  Perhaps we are familiar with this same way of moving through life in the past. We will get our pads and guards on so that we can brace for the unexpected and those painful blows. We will heighten up our defenses so are ready to push through and focus on the number one goal-to win and get what we want. Someone wins the game and someone loses. Unfortunately, this way of living will keep us clinging to comfort and security, thinking we can somehow outsmart the fundamental laws of the universe which teach us we truly cannot stabilize a life that is in constantly evolving and that we can control and avoid pain and discomfort. What is a more helpful image to aspire to in these times is to swim with the current, with our heads above water. Pointing our strokes toward the shore and allowing for course correction as we know the current will have its own pathway. We can swim at a pace that is not too fast or choppy to prevent from being depleted and disconnected from our breath and the natural current of the water yet not too slow that we feel we are simply treading water. We also want to allow for times to float on our back, gaze skyward, and take in the view and moment to enjoy being held by the mighty waters remembering why we are even swimming and to absorb the fact there are others in the water with us. This is a time to embrace our uncertainty.  Impermanence is the only certainty. When we are fixed in the "rock mind" of thinking the we know how it will go, that this is right and this is wrong, and this is how it has to be done then we might as well put our pads on and play football and prepare to get beat up. When we can temper ourselves to stay fully present in each moment in the "water mind" of fluidity and adaptability we can claim a momentary certainty in our choices that echo our truth and embodiment but we can surrender to the universal truth that we have no ability to control the outcome or the future. Not to give up and to claim that swimming is a futile effort because we will never know the outcome. But to realize the gift of impermanence in every decision keeps us open hearted and open to life. In the moment that we claim the truth and we act from it, in another moment it may possibly be the truth that we must depart from that action to stay in present time truth.  This leaves us in a very spacious place of unlimited possibilities and this brings us full circle back to Pisces. 

May you see as clearly with your eyes closed as when wide open, May you find tenderness in what you sense, courageously opening your heart alongside your eyes, May you embrace the freshness of this moment and all the blessings it bestows, may you revere those gifts with softness knowing their brief visit will make them even sweeter. May you see all beings as your opportunity to expand the way you practice loving yourself and honoring this life. May you lay your arrows down and replace them with flowers gifting others in their pain and even in their retaliation. May we all claim the title of warriors of love, embracing the uncertainty of what that means and the challenge to allow it to unfold moment by moment in our waking.

Love to you all!

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